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doof-doofblog · 4 years ago

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"How Do You Sleep At Night?!"

Thursday 8th April 2021

Hello again folks! We're back with another episode in my attempt to catch up, of course there was not an episode on Friday evening due to the passing of His Royal Highness Prince Philip - but that does mean that Monday was given two episodes! (Feeling slightly stressed with the amount of episodes I need to catch up on!) Plus being back at the day job and trying to save for a house is proving a bit stressful - but I want to let you all know I am committed to sticking to this blog, I've been at it for over a year so why should I stop now?!

I'll try my very best to catch up through out the week, but my post may have to be posted late in the evening, just a heads up incase you guys think I'm not posting! Anyway, let's get right to it and focus on the matter at hand, I'm going to begin first with mentioning Bailey, it turns out that Bailey has actually won the competition she applied for with the school, but she hasn't had the heart to inform her family about the win, knowing they won't be able afford the cost of her going to her expedition.

Unfortunately, as Bailey and her Dad are out taking little Banjo out for a walk, Isaac happens to congratulate Bailey on her win, much to Mitch's surprise. As Mitch begins to question his daughter, she admits that the hotel would cost them £200 and £30 for the coach trip. Mitch tries his absolute best to persuade his daughter not to worry and informs her that he will find the money some how for her go to on her trip. But as Mitch walks away leaving Bailey alone with little Banjo, she happens to notice the flyer advertising Banjo as lost dog "Ziggy"!

As devastating as it is for her, Bailey knows that she has do to the right thing and give Banjo back to his rightful owner. She get's Bernie to help her contact the owner and they arrange to meet up in the park. Only Bernie makes up a story about finding him behind some bins - I don't know about you guys but the dog didn't seem happy to see it's owner, you'd think it would recognise it's owner by sense of smell?! Personally, I believe the dog is actually more happy living with the Taylor's, even the girl could tell that the dog had been looked after. It's then that Bailey admits that they've been looking after the dog for a couple of weeks but had no idea that he was a lost dog. As the girl takes her dog and walks away, without a second glance at Bernie, for a split second the dog looks back at Bailey and Bernie, and I don't know why but for some reason, I am hoping the dog will be reunited with the Taylor family again, I'd like to think that we haven't seen the last of this adorable pup!

The second thing I have to focus on is Sharon and the arrival of her long lost half-brother, Zack! It look as if after his very much unwelcoming arrival to the Square, Zack slept in his car overnight outside of Sharon's apartment, regardless of Sharon making it perfectly clear to him that she didn't want him around and instructed him to go home! As Zack gets out of his car he pleads for his sister just hear him out, he claims he's not here for anything and wants anything from her, he just simply wants to talk.

However, when Jay approaches acknowledging the look of Zack's car, Zack almost insults Jay, warning him not to touch his car. As much as innocent as the situation was, I think his insult to Jay was a bit uncalled for, and it also gives an insight to his character, even Sharon makes a comment to him about interreacting with the locals. But in an attempt to make it up to her, he suggests taking her for breakfast so they can at least sit down and get to know each other.

Things seem to go well it seems at first, they begin to discuss Gavin and how each of them spent their childhood, it seems that they have some kind bond when it comes to discussions about their biological Dad, even though Sharon was adopted, her memories of Gavin aren't necessarily nice ones, but neither are Zack's and unfortunately, Gavin did bring him up! It appears that they are actually getting along. But as Kheerat walks in, Sharon begins to apologise to him for missing their date, but even then Zack's attitude towards the locals still doesn't impress Sharon, especially when he claims to Kheerat that Sharon can do better than him. But whilst Sharon still tries to arrange a second date with Kheerat, Zack discreetly nicks a pair of keys from Sharon's handbag!!! Doesn't appear to be the doting new brother does he?!

Later as Sharon is alone sorting out things for the gym, Jean approaches her with a bunch of flowers as a way of an apology for causing damage to her gym equipment, but luckily Sharon gives her the good news that she was in fact insured for all the damages. As Jean breathes a sigh of relief she compliments how things are slowly coming together, but when she happens to mention Sharon getting along with brother and mentioning that she saw Zack entering her flat, Sharon is instantly on the march to find out what her brother is up to!

Clearly, Zack is looking for something, he pretty much turns her apartment upside down and he searches high and low for something. Also I have to mention how I never realised that Sharon is now staying in the apartment that Mick and Linda were briefly staying in before they returned to the Vic! It's almost like they've simply swapped properties! Eventually Sharon finds her brother searching deep in her wardrobes, calling out to him and claiming that she knows exactly what he's after. It turns out that Gavin left Sharon a box, but the funny thing is, he left Zack the key to open it - so maybe he wanted his two children to meet one day?! As they both agree that whatever lays inside the box they'll go halves on, with hope they open the old metal black box. Unfortunately all that it holds inside is papers and memories such as old birthday cards, Zack is clearly angered - was he hoping for something else? Was there something more he was hoping to get his hands on?!

As they come to terms with the fact there was nothing of value in the box, Zack begins to reminisce about his Dad, recalling about a time when he made him fairy cakes but his Dad showed no sense of pride and informed his son not to embarrass him again, Sharon begins to feel a sense of compassion for her brother. I guess it's fair to say they've never had it easy when it's come to their parents - biological or adoptive. She opens up to Zack, informing her about her son Dennis and admits that maybe it would be nice to have a brother around? It looks as if there's some mutual ground between them, could this be the start of a powerful sibling relationship?!

Meanwhile, it looks as if Kush is having deep concerns about Ruby bringing up his son, Arthur. Poor Arthur has been dragged from pillar to post, losing his Mum, moving out of his Nan's to live with his second Dad and Stepmum. As little Arthur kicks a football about on his own, Kush admits to Whitney that little Arthur has spoken about shouting accruing whilst he's been staying with Ruby and Martin. Of course Kush trusts Martin with his son, but his biggest concern is Ruby.

In an attempt to build bridges and maybe find out a bit more, Kush takes it upon himself to visit Ruby alone. I think he spoke to Ruby in a very adult and mature way, he didn't go in all guns blazing and acknowledged that it must be hard with having 3 children suddenly to look after, especially considering the loss they have both been through, it's expected that sometimes parenting can get the better of you. Parenting isn't easy, that's for sure. He does however voice his concerns for Arthur and whether he wants him to be around raised voices.

But as much as Kush is being polite and reasonable, Ruby seems to think that he's attacking her, personally, and if Martin was present he wouldn't be voicing his concerns to Ruby. But the fact is that Kush knows exactly what Ruby is capable of and states that he can fill Martin in if he was pushed far enough, but Ruby calls his bluff - knowing full well that he wouldn't, simply because of his son! Ooooo I know it's coming, but I can't wait for Ruby to get her comeuppance! What do you guys think?!

Lastly, Kat and Phil are still sneaking about, it looks as if Kat had actually spent the night at the Mitchell household. Even though she's cautious of being seen, Phil informs her that Ben and Callum are aware of their romance and are happy for them to be seeing each other. Kat seems surprised by this news, it seems that she is deeply concerned about what people would say if they were to find out. I think it's perfectly clear that both Phil and Kat aren't quite ready to go public yet.

But, if they were to go public, what would they be going public as? A couple?! Friends With Benefits? Who knows? As far as Kat is concerned, they haven't had "The chat" - and everyone knows what she means by that! Whether their fling is something casual or whether it's leading to something more serious? I mean, at first it probably was just a bit of fun, but it's seems to be escalating as time goes on. Does Kat maybe want more from Phil than just fun and a romp? Are there feelings slowly growing for each of them?!

Later on, as Kat is doing her shopping in the Minute Mart, she happens to overhear Phil on the phone booking a couple's holiday away, from the sound of it, it sounds very romantic, a sea view cabin in a glorious destination! Poor Kat, she instantly assumes that Phil is booking them an exotic get away and instantly grabs a bottle of sun lotion! As the day progresses, Kat eventually finds Phil alone in the Arches and shows off the sun lotion that she's bought, asking him to wipe some on her back. At first, Phil seems to think she's joking, but as it comes clear that Kat believes they're going on holiday together, Phil puts her straight claiming that the holiday he has booked is actually a honeymoon for Ben and Callum.

Poor Kat instantly feels completely humiliated. Is she wanting to actually enter a proper relationship with Phil or is she getting the feeling that this fling is going nowhere? Everyone knows that Phil isn't the romantic type, but of course he was doing a nice gesture his son on his fiancé. I guess it's fair to say that Phil and Kat don't want their relationship to become public, but they still want to be together - whether that means intimately, emotionally - it could mean everything. Phil actually admits that he actually does like Kat and in a attempt to make it up to her, he suggests they go for meal, just the two of them.

Kat smiles, admitting that he's not exactly Shakespeare, but she's happy to finally be going somewhere with Phil other than the bedroom. Later on in the evening as Kat and Phil go their separate ways, Kat opens her front door to find a bunch of flowers left on her wall, reading the tag on the flowers she realises they're from Phil, maybe there is a romantic side to him after all?! Only, as Whitney witnesses Kat laughing on the phone to an unknown male, gushing over the bunch of flowers, she approaches her claiming that while Kat appears to be enjoying herself, Kush's life is on the line, he's facing prison simply because of Kat! She can't seem to understand why Kat seems to have forgotten about Kush's sacrifice to save his family.

Quite an interesting episode, once again, a lot of different things happening at once, but I'm really excited to see what happens next! I'm going to try and catch up as much as I can this week, but I want to thank you all for being incredibly patient with me! It really means the world! Thank you for your on-going support and I'll be back again very soon! Enjoy the rest of your day! Love you all xXx

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dracox-serdriel · 5 years ago

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It’s time we stopped saying people take “the easy way out” in medicine

I’d really like to stop hearing people say “people don’t want to make diet and other lifestyle changes, they just want pills” as if people wanting (or not wanting) things occurs in a vaccuum.

There seems to be an understanding that capitalism has made life exceptionally difficult, even for people and families in the so-called middle class. In the USA, even someone who is financial secure -- has savings, a retirement fund, “good” health insurance -- can be set back financially for years for injuries sustained in a car accident.

It seems to me that most people in the USA know that they’re not that far off from financial ruin. All it would take is a serious enough injury - or, worse, a fight to surive something like cancer. Suddenly, you go from being financially secure to screwed, and the system is set up so that you receive no aid until after you’ve depleted your carefully saved funds (and, in some cases, anything considered an “asset”, too).

All that hard work to do “the responsible thing” suddenly means nothing.

So when I hear someone say that “people don’t want to make life style changes -- they just want to pop a pill and fix it,” I have to wonder if this person is just generally unaware of the lurking financial crisis hanging over all our heads, or has -- for reasons unknown -- decided to persist in this ridiculous assumption that other human beings aren’t actually invested in the health of their own bodies.

After a patient hears that they are either fully prediabetic or are close to developing Type 2 Diabetes, do people really think that they don’t care that they’re about to develop a serious illness that will put them at risk for countless other maladies -- including a shortened lifespan?

Do people honestly believe that these individuals persist in their old eating habbits because they can’t be bothered by eating healthier? Isn’t it entirely possible that they have made “poor choices in diet” to due circumstances beyond their control? More specifically, isn’t it possible that those same circumstances are still beyond their control, even after they find out they need to “make a change”?

Isn’t it possible that these individuals “have a lunch break” that rare actually happens because of the “lean and mean” scheduling tactic their employer uses to save money? (Which results in them “grazing” rather than eating a single meal - a notoriously bad thing to do if you’re at risk for Type 2 Diabetes.)

Or maybe that’s not it. Maybe the issue is that when they go to the grocery store, their weekly grocery budget isn’t enough to cover purchasing “healthy” options -- not if they want to eat for the entire week, anyway.

Or maybe it’s not even that. Maybe they have enough money to buy “healthy” foods, but by the time they get home, they’re exhausted and hungry, and don’t have energy to cook -- or simply don’t want to spend over an hour preparing the “healthy” meal they’re supposed to eat that night when they’re hungry right now. (Or, worse, maybe they’re responsible for feeding other family members who are also hungry right now.)

The same goes for exercise. Do people honestly thing that other people don’t exercise because they’re lazy? Because “all people want to do is watch TV”? Really? Surely everyone must know that the vast majority of people like at least one activity that qualifies as exercise. (And if you disagree, think about it for a moment. Is there anyone you know who doesn’t like a single activity where they are moving? Anything. Anything where you are moving is excercise.)

But -- if that’s the case -- why don’t people in the USA exercise enough? If we have the desire, why aren’t we doing it?

It’s the same issue as eating “healthy” -- you need to have the time/money/opportunity to do the actiivty you like that counts as exercise. If you like gardening, you need to own (or have access to) a garden to do it. If you like running, you either need access to indoor equipment or an area where it’s safe to run outside. If you like exercises classes - like spin class or other workouts - you need the money to pay for those classes.

Yes, you can cheaply purchase some lifting weights to “exercise” at home. Hell, you might even be able to come up with an exercise routine that costs you no money at all -- but, there’s no such thing as an exercise routine that doesn’t cost you time -- which is often something people just don’t have, especially if they have to work more than one job, or if they have children/family members they’re responsible for taking care of. Surely, people must know that some people honestly don’t have an “extra” hour - or even an “extra” thirty minutes - for anything.

I’m also sick and tired of hearing stuff like, “Well, their priorities are wrong. They need to put their health first.”

What?

Tell me, isn’t it “healthy” to have adequate shelter and clothing, so as to avoid sunstroke, hypothermia, and other forms of illness and death by exposure? Oh, it is? Then I guess paying rent (and paying for clothing and clothing management) is part of “putting health first.”

Tell me, isn’t it “healthy” to have adequate calorie intake - even if it isn’t rich in nutrients - so that you don’t starve to death and lose your teeth? Oh, it is? Then I guess paying for groceries - even if they’re not all “healthy” foods - is part of “putting health first.”

This idea that people “aren’t putting their health first” because they stick with a crappy job to afford housing and other basic needs -- despite the negative impact on their health -- is ridiculous because leaving a crappy job (without haivng another one lined up) puts their health at even more risk then it is now.

It’s not that people don’t want lifestyle changes -- they don’t “want” a pill to make it better. The ugly truth is, the way things are now, they need a pill to make it better -- they need the fix to be something that won’t risk their livelihood because if they lose their job, they’re at risk for losing everything.

I have a disorder that’s technically systemic (meaning, it affects all systems in the body), though it’s classified as a neurological or a neuroendocrine disorder, since effects the neurological systems and the endocrine/hormone systems of the body directly.

When I first sought treatment, I was given medicine and some basic guidance on things to avoid whenever possible. Doctors explained to me that I needed to make behavioral (aka “lifestyle”) changes, too, but seemed resigned to the idea that I wouldn’t really bother doing more than the bare minimum (that way, I can say I’m following my doctor’s advice, but still be “lazy” or whatever).

For some reason, a lot of medical professionals seem invested in the idea that patient’s don’t make “good lifestyle choices” because we’re lazy - despite the fact that this makes no sense. There’s no logical basis for this assumption. Yet I see this idea everywhere. As if someone was really, really trying to convince us that other people have poor health because of “poor lifestyle choices” that they could change but simply choose not to. They have to work really hard at it, though, because most of us are making “poor lifestyle choices” not because we’re lazy idiots, but because capitalism has created a system where we’re forced to make “poor lifestyle choices” in order to meet our basic needs.

I was able to switch careers so I could have better pay and better health insurance. And once I had enough income, I was also able to make lifestyle changes. I was able to afford membership in a dojo so I could do martial arts training (which has been the most effective treament for my symptoms, most of which didn’t respond to any medications). I was also able to afford ridiculously high copays for trying so-called “orphan” drugs that had no generic version available yet. I was also able to afford dozens of specialists appointmnets each year to manage my disorder.

As a person who mananges most of her disorder’s worst symptoms by so-called “lifestyle changes,” I’m constantly told how impressed people are with “my approach” to handling my situation. Yes, people have told me they’re impressed with the fact that I am so willing to make lifestyle choices to benenfit my health. It’s very clear to me that these people don’t understand that most people in the USA aren’t being held back by will at all. They’re willing to make lifestyle changes, but they’re not able to implement them.

As someone who has done “lifestyle choices” -- as someone whose life was literally transformed by “lifestyle choices” -- I know how incredibly difficult it was to do. And you know what? I don’t know a single person in my life who wouldn’t do the same thing.

Notice in my story that I mentioned switching careers. I was able to do that because I graduated with a dual degree. I had the opportunity to change not just jobs, but my entire career path, in order to enter a field that has decent pay and health insurance. I only was able to make “better lifestyle choices” to treat my disorder because I made enough money - and had good enough benefits - to make those changes to begin with.

No matter how difficult it was to implement these changes in my life, I assure you, choosing to do it was easy as soon as I had the opportunity to actually choose to begin with. My life is definitely better because of it. But that being said, I am also keanly aware that money was a prerequisite to these changes. Like I said, I don’t know a single person who wouldn’t make the same choices I did, but I know plenty of people who don’t have those choices at all.

It’s shocking to me how people act as if “good lifestyle choices” are made free of charge. Nobody wants “the easy way out” when it comes to medicine. Nobody wants to put the one body that’s their own at risk just because they’re “too lazy” to do anything else. That’s 100% capitalist propaganda.

#health #medicine #long post #capitalism

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agentkgent · 5 years ago

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Fic: If You Want It Back

Chapter One: You’d Probably Think (Tumblr | AO3)

Chapter Two: If You Knew | Read on AO3

(This is a short chapter, mostly establishing that our boys are on opposite sides of the country as adults; They do not remember each other and they are not happy; this isn’t necessarily a HAPPY chapter, but it’s setting up for some cavity-inducing sweet fluff heading your way!)

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Eddie | 39

“Eddie, there just won’t be enough room for all of this!” Myra insists, gesturing to the boxes of clothes.

Eddie gives a half-hearted chuckle and runs a hand through his hair. “Sweetheart, I need space for my stuff, too.”

Myra quirks her eyebrow at him and continues to argue. “This is my closet. That was the deal.”

“Honey, it’s attached to our bedroom.”

Myra turns icy at his response. “It is my closet. We’re in this tiny apartment that you wanted, that you said was so important, and I said I need my own walk-in closet. That was the deal.”

“Myra, this apartment is hardly tiny. And I have to be able to put my clothes away.”

“There’s a dresser over there,” she points.

He looks for a moment. “How can I fit all my things in three drawers?”

Myra shrugs carelessly. “And I didn’t get my craft room. Figure it out, Eddie.”

He sighs in defeat. “Yes, dear, I know.”

Eddie and Myra Kaspbrak are finally moving into their first home in New York - an apartment just south of Midtown Manhattan. It’d been a long time coming, a lot of long, frustrating conversations on home amenities and proximity to the airport. He had to do a lot of traveling, after all.

Eddie knows this isn’t what Myra wanted. What she wanted was a two-story, four-bedroom, two-bath modern home and a fucking jacuzzi in the backyard. If he had a nickel for every time he had to say, “I just don’t make enough money, sweetheart,” or “That’s too far a drive from JFK,” and “We may need to move, I can’t get locked into a mortgage just yet.” He mine as well have been negotiating with his mother. (God rest her soul.) Myra only understood that Eddie made “good money” with the insurance company. To her, that meant they made “plenty of money” to afford whatever she wanted.

He pulls off his jacket, and pulls up his long sleeves to get to work on his boxes of clothes.

“Eddie-bear, you know you don’t need all those clothes. Just get rid of some things,” Myra says from inside her closet. He refuses to turn around and watch her carefully placing her designer handbags and shoes. “Just keep work clothes out and leave the rest in storage.”

“Sure and I’ll just sleep in my work clothes, too.” He says quietly to himself. He carefully cuts open the first box and looks over the stack of nicely folded shirts in air-tight bags, organized by color. He pushes the box to the side and moves onto the next box, that reads “Eddie: Miscellaneous” on the side in marker. This one might actually contain stuff he can get rid of to appease his wife.

His wife.

Eddie loves Myra. Of course he loves his wife. Eddie is a good man with a good job and goals and loves his wife very much. Myra was the perfect woman for him, exactly his type. He enjoys kissing her. He enjoys sleeping with her. She takes care of him. She loves him. Not a lot of people love Eddie, but Myra does. She’s his better half. She keeps him in check. Keeps him focused on what’s important. ...Which, would be her, he guesses?

The key to a healthy, successful marriage is repeating these things over and over again until they’re real, right?

He hears his lovely, selfless, caring wife strut out of the room towards their new living room.

He cuts open the “miscellaneous” box, full of clothes that are not in air-tight baggies nor are they organized by color. He can already smell age on them, possibly dust and mildew from sitting in his mother’s storage. He pulls a few items out, looking at them and then back inside the box. There’s not too many things in here, but it’s obvious they are not from his adulthood. He then examines the few clothing items he’s pulled out - an old fannypack (From when he was a kid, always carrying his meds around. That can go;) an old pair of pajamas (Myra will yell at him for wearing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pajamas like a teenager. These can go;) a couple old polo shirts (From college, probably. And probably too small by now. They can go;), a zip-up hoodie…

The hoodie looks like it might fit. (But he never wears ash-gray, it’s too cheap-looking for his tastes.) It is a jacket hoodie, might be nice for layering in cold New York winters. He looks over its condition. It’s very worn, almost like it’s supposed to look vintage. One of the wrist cuffs is ripped open at the seam, like someone’s been shoving their fingers through it, something only an annoying kid would do. There’s also a rusty brown stain on the opposite cuff, which is undoubtedly blood. Ew. He looks at the zipper of the jacket, which is missing a metal tab, and extra difficult to zip. Okay, well that’s great. There is no size or manufacturer tag, it’s apparently been ripped out. The strings coming out of the hoodie near the neck are discolored and dingy, and ...are those bite marks at the plastic ends? Disgusting.

There are dark, hard spots around the edges of the pockets on the front. He rubs his thumb across them gently, and knows. They’re cigarette burns. Wow. Well, this definitely wasn’t his, he’s never smoked a day in his life. He would really like to not die of cancer, thank you very much.

His thoughts are abruptly cut short when Eddie subconsciously catches a whiff of the jacket. Undoubtedly, he smells cigarette smoke. Maybe even marijuana, which he’s never touched. But there’s more than that. He pulls the jacket closer to his face, closes his eyes, and smells.

Body spray. Not the nice cologne Eddie wears, but some kind of cheap, douchey-smelling body spray meant to impress girls. Wood. Burning wood, like a bonfire. And… sweat. Someone else’s sweat. Which really should be gross, and it sort of is first, but he keeps breathing it in. It’s an unidentifiable, masculine smell from someone this hoodie belonged to.

There’s something warm in his chest. His heart is pounding as he inhales the jacket’s bouquet over and over again.

“It’s one of my faves.” He can hear a voice say quietly, from somewhere dark in his brain.

His hands are shaking as he sets it down and wipes his hand across his mouth and nose, fidgeting. His mind is racing to identify where this jacket came from, but he can’t complete his mental search. There’s like, nothingness where he expects to find answers. He can feel sweat forming on his forehead and his throat getting tighter. What is happening? Is this an asthma attack? He hasn’t had an attack in years. He puts his hand on his chest and forces himself to breath at a steadier pace, in and out, in and out.

“Eddie-bear, you ok?” He’s startled for a moment. How long was Myra standing there?

He clears his throat. “Yes, dear, I’m okay.” Gotta make up something to throw her off, he doesn’t want her thinking he has ever smoked. She’d never let him live it down. “Just trying to figure out if this is clean or not.”

Myra rips the hoodie from his hand, Eddie grasps at it pathetically. “Why? What does it smell like?” She holds the hood of it up to her nose, then scrunches her face at it. “It doesn’t smell like anything. Just smells dirty.” She tosses it back to him. “Also, it’s torn up. Why do you still have it?” She steps across the wood floors back towards her precious closet. “Just throw it out.”

He knows already this isn’t even his jacket. He just… doesn’t understand why he has it. What he does know is getting rid of it is not an option. He needs this. He’s… supposed to return it, he thinks.

He decides that there is room for it. So he folds it tightly and sticks it in the back of his bottom dresser drawer, where he hopes Myra won’t ever notice it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Richie | 39

Richie wants to fall asleep. Everything will be easier if he just falls asleep. Everything will be over sooner if he just falls asleep.

He looks at his smart watch. It’s 2:40 a.m.

He’s lying on his bed in his LA home, naked except for his boxers, next to a stranger he has just had sex with. The sex was fine, pretty standard. She wasn’t interested in foreplay, which he doesn’t mind because he’s not good at pretending to enjoy it. He’s not really interested in her. She’s not interested in him either, he thinks. She’s probably just interested in writing about it on one of those bullshit ‘celebrity sex review’ blogs. A part of him kind of hopes, actually.

He’s sure of one thing: he wants her out of his home so he can continue to be miserable in peace.

The bed is shifting and he can feel a hand on his chest.

“You okay?” The stranger asks in an innocent voice that fools no one. She’s pretty enough. Rich, dark hair and brown eyes. Tanned skin and a nice body. He doesn’t remember her name or if they even actually talked at the bar. She knew who he was, and that was enough.

“Fuckin great.” He fakes a smile at her. She starts to snuggle against him, which is not the response he wanted. “Hey, listen, this was awesome, but I’m flying out early tomorrow.” He had really hoped to just doze off and deal with this in the morning. But his favorite lie usually worked to get these types of strangers out of his home, out of his life.

“Oh. Where are you going?” She rests her chin on his chest.

“...Chicago.”

“I love Chicago!” She giggles.

Another fake smile, but more difficult to pull of. “Yep.” And he gently moves from under her, leaning away.

“You should totally go to the giant silver bean and take selfies by it-”

“Listen, I gotta get up super early, so I’m gonna call you an Uber.” He lifts himself from the bed and walks across the bedroom to pull on a t-shirt.

“Oh? Okay.” She responds too happily. It’s irritating that she isn’t taking a hint. She gets up and begins pulling on her shorts and heels.

Richie heads to his nightstand, where he picks up his phone and requests an Uber to his Hollywood home. “‘Jerry’ will be here in six minutes in his ‘2015 Toyota Camry.’ He’ll take you wherever you want.” He’s not very good at hiding the fact that he doesn’t really care if she gets home, just as long as she goes.

He hears her ridiculously tall Stilettos click behind him and feels hands on his shoulders. “My number’s in your phone. Call me when you get back?”

Goddamn it, just go already. “Sure.”

Her arms drop to her sides and she makes an annoyed noise. She just got the hint.

His sexual guest struts across the living room towards the entryway, holding her bag and jacket. Richie can’t help but examine her ass as she walks, even though there’s no longer any mystery to what lies beneath her shorts. He scans the room for anything missing (he’s been robbed by a hot woman once or twice) and sees a bright pink bra and lacy top still lying on the couch. He sees that she is wearing his shirt, on her way out.

Nuh-uh, no, NOPE, they are not playing this game. “Uh, sweetheart.” He whistles. She stops and turns to him, and he responds by eyeing her up-and-down. “Can I have my shirt back?”

She tests him with a coy smile. “Well, maybe I’ll bring it back to you?”

“No, no no no no no no, you can wear your own clothes home. That’s my favorite shirt.” He extends an arm and is flexing his fingers in a ‘gimme’ motion.

She’s taken aback, but comes back towards him to take off the shirt. Slowly. Presenting her tits.

They’re not that impressive. And she’s being annoying, so he’s done pretending to be charming.

He smirks, snatches the shirt from her hand, and then walks back towards his bedroom.

He can hear her shuffle to pick up her remaining clothes, her heels clicking across the floor. She scoffs. “So, that’s it?”

He doesn’t face her, he just raises a waving hand to gesture ‘goodbye.’ “That’s it!”

“Wow. Fuck you.” She spouts.

Richie tosses his shirt on his kitchen counter. Bless his open floor plan. “Yeah, thanks for that.”

She mockingly laughs and opens the front door. “You’re an asshole. And you’re not funny.”

“Okie dokes!” He says casually at her.

The Uber driver pulls up behind her in the driveway. “ASSHOLE!” She shrieks, and slams the door shut.

He slumps onto his stupidly-expensive couch and exhales in relief. “Yep. I sure am.”

He doesn’t know why he allows himself to get used by every horny fan he meets. (And “fan” is a generous term. None of them even give a shit about his comedy, they just know who he is and that he’s got a couple specials on Netflix.)

He should be grateful. He’s got everything he could ever want and need. He’s got a huge house, plenty of money, 156K followers on Instagram, more comedy special gigs on the way, may even go on tour with some big names. He’s got a shot at Saturday Night Live, his manager tells him. Not that Richie wants to move to New York. He doesn’t know anyone in New York.

Not that he knows anyone in LA, either. Just horny fans he meets in sleazy bars.

He should be grateful, and he knows that. But he’s just miserable. And alone.

He rubs his eyes under his glasses and lets them fall back onto his nose before he stands up to march himself to sleep. He grabs his shirt on the way back to his empty bedroom.

“Bitch thought she could take my favorite shirt.” And he flicks off the lightswitch.

#reddie #fanfic #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #adult reddie #miserable reddie #dont worry we'll make them happy i promise dude #ao3 #chapter 2

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buzzdixonwriter · 5 years ago

Text

Duty Now For The Future (part six)

Small and mobile

There’s a Venn diagram to be made of the overlap among --

The tiny house community

The nomad community

Homeless people living in cars

These are all reactions to a capitalism driven consumer economy: Buy real estate! Build big house! Fill them full of stuff! Buy more real estate! Build bigger house! Buy more stuff! (Go deeply into debt paying us high interest rates on the inflated prices of your purchases.)

Somewhere in that diagram -- more to the tiny house side of the equation -- sit those who make a conscious choice of “Hold! Enough!” and take steps to reduce their footprint and baggage.

At the other end, people forced out of homes and apartments desperately trying to keep their lives together long enough to get a roof over their heads.

In the middle (and I think this is a huge overlap in the nomad community) are those who, faced with the prospect of losing their permanent residence, tell others (and let’s be honest, themselves) that they voluntarily made the choice to take up the nomad lifestyle.

Now there’s a fourth overlap to add to the diagram:

People who won’t / can’t afford to travel abroad.

Soon-ok and I are extremely fortunate that we got to take some trips to Europe over the last decade or so, as well as going together to Korea, plus a few trips to Hawaii.

We are -- and will remain -- extremely leery of traveling anywhere by air in the future (by train or bus, too).

Unless and until there’s a vaccine, we’re a little leery of cramming ourselves into a metal tube with strangers for hours on end, then traveling to crowded tourist spots.

Even before the coronavirus we’d discussed when we should stop traveling by air for our trips and start traveling by car or train.

We enjoy Canada and would be delighted to return there, and the US still offers many under visited regions and attractions we’d love to see.

With tourism and airline travel taking a massive hit -- one from which they will not speedily recover due to lack of consumer confidence and high unemployment -- more Americans will opt for domestic travel and trips, driving their own vehicles.

Vans and SUVs will remain a favored vehicle since they can be easily converted or adapted to self-sufficient long distance traveling and tourism.

Campgrounds and trailer / RV parks already exist; the large amount of underused / abandoned shopping mall space offers opportunities to provide similar services for small scale urban travelers who don’t want to sleep out in the wild under the stars but in the comfort and safety of their own van, on a parking lot patrolled and maintained well enough to be safe.

This is good news for the domestic auto industry and the various companies that support it.

It will also put enormous pressure on bringing the price of self-driving vehicles down low. Insurance companies will offer lower premiums to folks and families who let the car do the driving, and that, coupled with the appeal of just being able to sit back and enjoy the scenery / watch a video / read a book / take a nap / get ring-tailed drunk, will push that market forward.

Eventually we’ll reach a tipping point where a lot of people and their families will see more sense and cents in living in a vehicle than owning a home, and then real estate will take another tumble. (What about the children, you ask? Remote learning; the Australians have been doing it successfully in the outback for generations).

It’s not for everybody, but it’s sure gonna be for a lot of people.

. . .

Sports are broken and need to get fixed

Captain Lou Albano, when asked if professional wrestling was fixed, famously answered, “It wasn’t broken.”

Sports now are broken.

(I want to differentiate between sports in the forms of athletics, as in team sports for students, neighborhood bowling leagues, city marathons, etc., and sports as a business where personalities and icons are marketed to fans and the revenues derive less from the gate and more from advertising and merchandising incomes; we’ll be discussing primarily the latter here.)

I’m surprised that with all the numerous sports games and simulations out there, ESPN or some other entity failed to see the potential of wholly digital sports, pitting classic era teams against one another in a competition decided purely by AI.

Seriously, for the average fan sitting in front of their TV at home, what separates a digital team from a real team?

The personalities?

Okay, fine, you can recruit and groom real life personalities for the fans to idolize, but then you can stage everything else safely (and less expensively) in the digital realm.

Don’t raise your eyebrow at me; this is essentially what professional wrestling does.

People really interested in sports for the grace and skill watch amateur competitions as well as professional ones.

Fans interested only in proving their tribe is superior to other tribes, not so much.

You can still keep national / regional / state / city chauvinism going through digital imagery.

Of course, it will be argued that the opportunities for fixing such an event are rampant.

So?

The chauvinist fans just want to win, they don’t care how.

The Boston fans can view a streaming channel where their teams wins the playoffs all the time; the New York fans get their channel where they win, etc., etc., and of course, etc.

Amateur athletics will reman unfixed, of course (well, officially unfixed). People will watch those because (a) children or relatives are playing or (b) they play themselves.

The (b) group will watch televized tennis and golf because those are sports they enjoy and they hope to pick up pointers.

The (a) group will go to games and meets because that’s what family does.

(By the way, expect track and field, golf, tennis, volleyball, and related sports to rise in popularity among students and other amateurs; they allow play while social distancing.)

. . .

Capitalism is fixed and needs to be broken

Capitalism works when it’s kept on a leash with a muzzle and we pick up after it when it poops on people’s lawns.

What we face now is rabid coyote capitalism.

A big hunk of the problem will be self correction as major corporations will face a rapidly changing future and divest themselves of everything they consider marginal.

That’s gonna be a lot of stuff.

Dominos falling now will topple other dominos we can only guess at, but rest assured, corporations do not flourish when dominos topple.

Another part will be the realization that despite almost a century of lies by the 1% and their alt-right / cryptofascist stooges, less government is not better government.

For all the claims that a free market economy could respond more nimbly to changing circumstances, we now face a brutal pandemic that could have been blunted and was blunted by nations with a better handle on their economies.

The response to the COVID-19 pandemic couldn’t be effectively mounted by a market based system for the brutally simple reason that there was no market for such a response before the pandemic occurred.

That’s the job of a government; to look ahead and anticipate and plan and prepare and at least have some coherent response to any number of threats that might suddenly arise.

In the past we had national governmental agencies that tracked pandemics and the spread of disease so as to minimize both their loss of life and the impact on the economy.

For all his sins and shortcomings, George W. Bush and his administration realize the threat pandemics posed and took great strides to organize America’s response so them should they occur. Barack Obama built on that, organizing it even better, learning from mistakes made in earlier pandemics to make the response to the next one more efficient.

Donald Trump tore all that down in a fit of pique in order to pass the savings along to his billionaire donors.

It’s as if he closed down the fire department and then, when a five-alarm blaze broke out, asked his cronies to start designing smoke alarms.

A rising tide lifts all boats, but it drowns those who can’t get in one.

The other side of the COVID-19 pandemic will want a return to “normal” not “greatness”.

There is, of course, no genuine “normal” to return to.

What we can do is progress, move forward, make the next model of American society better.

A lot of people -- old white people, primarily -- aren’t going to like that.

COVID-19 may be trying to tell ya sumthin’, folks…

”I was born by a river, oh man, in this little old tent, oh Just like this river, I've been running ever since It's been a long, long time coming But I know, but I know, a change is gotta come Ooo yes it is” -- Otis Redding

#COVID-19 #post-pandemic #pandemic #future #duty now for the future

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arthurs-wife · 6 years ago

Note

Is there any way you could do something with a future female reader? Maybe she gets gets sent back in time or she brings Arthur to the future 🤷��♀️ you're choice fam.

(i might have gone overboard, this was an amazing prompt, thank you so much!)

You had found a time in your busy schedule to take a moment to yourself. Work and school, your family, that guy who kept pestering you at the library, it all melted away for a few moments as you lay out in the middle of the greenway. The sun shone down on you happily and you felt the grass beneath your legs.

Truly though, the universe couldn’t afford to bring you a few moments peace. The air to your left suddenly warped like old wood and through it came a horse, a man riding it as fast as he could. They streaked across the greenway and you stood up slowly, following them intently. The man seemed to realize he wasn’t where he ought to be and stopped, you could hear his deep voice echo through the field.

You shoved your glasses into your hair and saw him spin around, spotting you and waving an arm. He called at you faintly and you raised an arm to meet him, starting towards him.

You met in the middle and saw the man up close. He looked disheveled and extremely out of place.

“S’cuse me miss,” he greeted in an accent you didn’t recognize, “can you uh, tell me where we are?”

“We’re in Florida,” you said slowly, “I take it from that rip in space time back there that you’re not where you thought you were?”

“Where’s Florida?”

“Southern-most state,” you replied.

“I was just in Lemoyne,” he muttered, wiping his brow and looking around again.

“Lemoyne?” you scoffed, “what are you from the 1800s?”

“Is this not the 1800s?”

“Florida hasn’t been called Lemoyne since 1912,” you said, putting a hand on your hip.

“What year is it now?” he asked, surely he wasn’t looking forward to the answer.

“2019, my friend.”

“Well ain’t that just a damper on my day.”

You looked back at your car then to the man again.

“Can I bring you back to town with me?” you asked, “I’m not sure what you can do about your horse though.”

“Well where’s yours?”

Oh boy.

“I have my own ride,” you tried to explain, “if we want to get anywhere we’ll have to take it.”

The man considered before jumping down and smacking his horse on the rear and sending her away.

“She’ll find me again,” he assured you, “let’s get to this ride of yours.”

You led him back to your car and opened the door for him. He hesitated a moment, walking around the car and taking it all in.

“This a stagecoach?” he asked.

“Sort of,” you cocked your head, “just without the horses. And the whips. Anyway, come on, get in.”

He clambered in and shut the door, waiting for you to get in and start the engine. He put out his hands instinctively when it roared to life and you put yours on his knee. You both looked at it for a moment before settling back down.

“Sorry,” you said, “my name is y/n.”

“Arthur.”

You shook hands. The engine puttered away and you sat there for a moment.

“I’m not even sure where to take you man,” you looked at him.

“Well,” he thought for a moment, “I just jumped 120 years ahead of my time and there’s nothing saying I won’t get ripped back in an instant. Show me what the future of civilization looks like. Show me it’s worth it.”

You shrug and start driving away, bumping down the road until you hit asphalt. Arthur is stock still in his seat, holding onto the door.

“The ‘oh, shit’ bar is right there,” you say.

“The what?”

You motion to the handle above his door and he grabs it.

“Mind if I put on some music?” you ask.

“I’m curious to see how anything works right now,” he laughs, “go on, show me.”

At the red light you take out your phone and pull up Spotify, plugging your aux cord in and putting on some music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0sEclM9JRw

You were pretty out in the sticks but Arthur watched your every movement, taking your phone and inspecting every inch of it. He was full of questions and kept asking you how the car worked, how the streetlights worked, how was the music coming from your phone to the car?

You eventually made your way into civilization and Arthur was glued to the window.

“What’s that place?”

You looked and he was pointing to the mall.

“It’s like a general goods store,” you explained, “but for shit you don’t need.”

“Can we go?”

“Sure, but we’re getting you changed.”

He looked down at himself.

“What for?”

The mall wasn’t as crowded as usual which was good. You told him to leave the hat in the car and follow you.

He really was a fish out of water. You entered a department store and he looked around in awe.

“How’s it so cold in here?” he asked.

“AC,” you said and stopped yourself, “air conditioning. Blows cold air through those vents.”

You pointed and he looked.

“I’ll be damned.”

Shopping was far too fun. You spent too much time dressing him in different outfits and finally settling on a pair of jeans with a black button up shirt.

“You clean up nicely,” you said, eyes lingering too long on his butt, “want to get your hair done?”

“You don’t like it?” he said, turning around to face you.

“Personally I like the long hair,” you said, motioning for him to come with you, “I just didn’t know if you were, like, able to cut it.”

“We can’t,” he said sadly, shaking his head, “scissors weren’t around in 1899.”

You narrowed your eyes and looked at him. He smirked and you shoved him with a shoulder.

Clothes acquired you set off again, keeping an eye out for things you thought Arthur would like. Your afternoon adventure with a cowboy was proving to be one of the most interesting times in your life.

“Oh, I have to take you here!” you turned quickly into a parking lot and found a space, “sorry, I’ll cool it with the swerving.”

“I have no idea what you just said,” Arthur grumbled, exiting the car and following you, “what is this place?”

“This is Publix,” you motioned and the doors opened automatically, fascinating Arthur to no end, “best grocery store on earth.”

Arthur marvelled at the amount of produce, fresh meat, liquor selection.

“What’s this stuff over here?” he motioned to the section of organic items.

“Oh we’re doing this thing now where everything has to be organic,” you said, picking up a bundle of bok choy, “we got tired of all the chemicals.”

“There weren’t no chemicals back in my day.”

“Oh you’re right,” you agreed, “but since your time, we started mass producing, throwing chemicals in our food and it scared us so now we’re back to doing things your way. Full circle.”

“I guess.”

“Come on, I’ll get you a Pub sub.”

“A what?”

You hoped you weren’t overloading the man with everything as you watched him try and eat the entire chicken tender sub, but he looked so amazed at how one person could eat such a big portion.

“Tastes funny,” he said, chewing thoughtfully, “is that the chemicals?”

“No I got you the organic kind,” you smirked.

He chuckled but ate the whole sandwich anyway.

You were sitting on your car’s hood outside of a CVS after buying Arthur a pack of cigarettes that he was thoroughly enjoying.

“What’d you say these were?” he asked, inspecting the pack.

“Cowboy killers,” you said.

“How about that.”

He started coughing, a massive fit that ended with some blood on the ground. You patted his back, concerned, but he waved you off.

“I’m afraid I’m not long for this world, darlin’,” he said, “although I do find it amusing that the creator thought to show me the future of this damn world before I die.”

“What’s wrong with you?” you asked.

“I have tuberculosis,” he said mournfully, “pretty bad case, the doc told me.”

“Do you remember what year it is?” you asked, getting up to walk across the street, “come on, I have an idea.”

The clinic was also thankfully empty, it seemed like the universe picked today for you to save this handsome cowboy’s life.

“Hi,” you said, approaching the counter, “this is my brother and he’s not on my insurance but I think he has TB. Can you help?”

“Tuberculosis?” the nurse said, deadpan.

“Yeap.”

“Insurance?”

“Can you just put it on my tab?”

“No.”

“Fine,” you huffed, “out of pocket it is.”

The wait wasn’t long and you two watched Jurassic Park. He had so many questions.

“You know you’re a pretty forward thinker for someone from your time,” you finally said, “it’s not a bad thing, I’m just surprised.”

“The gang I run with tries to be as accepting as possible,” he said, “but things aren’t looking too good for the minorities. Does it get better?”

You wish you could tell him different.

“I’m sure in another 120 years it’ll be better.”

“Mr. Morgan?”

The stone faced doctor called you back and you followed her to the room.

“Nurse says you have TB, huh?”

As a response, Arthur coughed his entire lung out.

“Okay,” the doctor said, pulling a cover over her face and handing you one, “I’m going to do a TB skin test on you and see what it does.”

She put a small needle in his forearm and he winced.

“Come back in 24 hours to see the results and we’ll go from there, okay?”

“24 hours?”

“That’s how long the test takes to show if there’s TB in your system.”

“In the meantime,” she said, pulling out a pad, “I’m going to give you this prescription for Isonaizid and rifapentine, you’ll take each one once a week for three months. Sound good?”

He nodded and took the paper, and you led him out of the room. Out in the waiting room, you pointed to your car motioned him to wait by it.

“Can you send me the bill please?” you asked the nurse, “here, I’ll give you my address.”

Back at the car Arthur shook his head as you approached.

“It’s that easy?”

“Not always,” you said, starting the car and heading to the pharmacy, “I think they just took pity on you.”

Arthur near fainted when the clerk asked for $300 for the drugs.

“I’ll just put it on my credit card,” you said, pulling it out and swiping.

“Do I even want to know?”

“Not unless you want to stay in the future for the next two weeks while I explain it.”

“Can we go back to that field now?” he asked back in the car, “as much fun as this was I miss the open space. It’s too crowded here.”

You nodded and headed back, taking the scenic route and passing trees, farms, dilapidated old houses held up more with charm than brick.

“So you all can cure all diseases like that now?” he asked.

“No, there’s still stuff like cancer, mental illnesses, auto-immune disorders,” you listed, “that we just kind of have to live with. We’re also still pretty horrible to black people and women and disabled folks. And we’re still at war with pretty much everyone.”

“You’ve had 120 years for christ’s sake,” Arthur laughed, “what the hell y’all been doing?”

“Making money, I guess.”

You turned off your car at the field and got out, fully appreciating the crisp air and open sky, even moreso now.

“So what do you think,” you asked, “is all this civilization worth the hype?”

He looked at you sadly and down at the antibiotics in his hand.

“Do you think it’s worth it?” he retorted.

You didn’t know.

The air behind you ripped again and Arthur’s horse trotted up. He put the antibiotics in his bag and held out a hand.

“Thank you for saving my life, y/n.”

“Weren’t nothin’,” you tried and he gave you a look. “Take care of yourself, Arthur.”

He nodded at you and mounted his horse, trotting off to the rip and looking back at you. He raised an arm and you waved back before he disappeared completely. He was gone.

You weren’t sure why but you spend a good amount of time crying in your car after that. The sight of his hat, still on the floorboard, made you laugh and you put it on.

Fastest cowboy in Florida.

#arthur morgan #red dead redemption 2 #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x female reader #time travel shenanigans

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letsimportanttreecollection-blog · 7 years ago

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Does insurance agents give you the lowest price insurance?

or do they give you a higher priced insurance to make more profit?

What is a good cheap online insurance?

I have Allstate at the moment but I want to swith to something that is way cheaper but that is still good coverage any ideas? thanks. is there aperson i can go to that will help me find the cheapest insurance based on my information?

""Which car insurance companies are the cheapest in New York State( queens, new york) in particular?""

I just bought a new car and am hoping to get car insurance and register it. I am curious what the cheapest companies are. I just got a quote from Esurance.com, and am curious if there are other cheaper companies. I am 22 and have a bachelors degree and a job. I want to insure a mazda protege hatchback. Please let me know what your experiences have been.""

First car + First insurance policy tips?

Alright Y!A? :) Right, so I'm 17 and I'll probably be doing my driving test pretty soon because I'm far into lessons and I've passed my theory test already. (UK - Northern Ireland, Belfast) I'm just wondering what tips you guys out there have maybe from first hand experience or what your friends, siblings or general family have done etc. I'm getting around 3200 in the June when I turned 18 because of a car crash I was in when I was like 9 so I'm hoping to get a car + a year's insurance for around 2500 at the maximum. (Hopefully) I'll probably get a car of a maximum price of about 1000 because in reality I don't need anything fancier than that, the max engine size I'd consider would probably be 1.2 and I'd want my insurance to be such that I can use the car for work such as delivering pizzas or chineses etc. so I have more options trying to find a job atm. I'm just wondering what tips you people have? Could I realistically get insurance for 1500 (Max) or under on a 1000 (Max) car with a 1.2 (Max) Litre engine? I might have to borrow money off my parents and pay them back when I'm 18 if I pass a good few months before my birthday. I'm not coming here telling you to tell me where to get cheap car insurance, I hate questions like that lol cheap car insurance doesn't exist for 17 year olds because we're all boy racers Bla-bla-bla, it's head melting! I just want to use my car to drive to college (5 minute drive), possibly work in depending on if I get a job at this bar or not and drive to peoples' houses if I need to and other general driving. I'm not just going to drive it for the craic at 3am down the motorway doing 100mph, I couldn't be bothered with all that. All I want is tips to get it as cheap as humanly possible like what I should do about named drivers, voluntary excess and anything else that might drive down the price. When it comes to it I'll ring round every insurance company available to insure people in Northern Ireland and haggle them all quoting them against each other and hope for the best. Please don't tell me specific insurance companies to go for unless you know that they definitely include NI, a lot of them exclude us. P.S. I'm a sensible guy, I'm paying for it all by myself (as far as I'm aware) so spare me the irresponsible, kid, joy rider, inexperienced, spoilt comments that so often creep up in these areas. Thanks! :)""

94 firebird formula v8 insurance rate?

I'm turning 16 and I am getting the 94 firebird out of the garage. how much do you think it will cost for insurance for me? and how much do you think it would cost under an adult insurance rate?

PLEASE ANSWER!!!!!!!! discounts on insurance?

SO IM 18 YEARS OLD, I HAVE MY LICENSE... AND I WANT TO GET A CAR SOON. PREFERBALY AN 2006 ACURA RSX COUPE (i know coupes are alot more expensive...) but i was wondering if i can get ...show more""

Car insurance - car pay out?

Recently my friend had an accident. His car is an import and the insurance company want to write it off and as they cannot get hold of replacement parts. Does he have the right to refuse their offer for pay out as the car is worth more than they are giving him. As its an import, and a sports car, he knows he can get more for it on auto trader and eBay. Or can he settle the claim with them by asking them to pay for the repair if he can sort out a garage who is willing to fix his car for less than the insurance company had suggested.""

Why does car insurance rates increase if you have a lapse in coverage?

For example, lets say I have car insurance and pay it on a timely matter and then all of a sudden I move to city where there is a lot of public transportation and my car breaks down. So, instead of worrying about my car I utilize the bus system as I cannot afford to have my car fixed, in turn I cancel my car insurance. Hypothetically lets say a couple months down the road I have a change of heart and am able to afford the repairs for my car. So now my car is up and running etc etc. Why is it that now when I sign up for insurance again my rates will be higher. My situation is that I have a vehicle but it is a lot older and it is broken down right now. It is going to be a few months before I can get it fixed. So, I thought of canceling my insurance bc I was wondering why should I pay insurance for something I am not driving. I, then, told my agent that once i got it fixed i would add the insurance back, he then told me what the consequences of my actions would be. Why do my rates go higher just bc I get rid of the insurance? It's not like I am doing anything illegal. I would not be driving the car bc it is broke down.""

Do you have to be on someone's insurance to drive a car?

In the state of Florida, if your name isn't on a policy, can you still drive a car? I know that some insurance companies offer uninsured driver insurance, in case someone without insurance hits you. But, do you need to be paying monthly on a policy if you don't have a car of your own?""

Where can I find affordable family health insurance?

Looking to find several health company quotes.

How much should a person pay for car insurance in uk?

Cheapest car to insure for a 21year old?

hey let me firstly tell you all my situation.....im 21 years old, a new driver only having just got my licence looking to buy and insure my first car. i wanted to buy a 1999 peugeot 206 1.1 which costs 700 but the insurance is almost 3000 which i just cant afford? can anyone think of any other half decent cars that arnt too expensive and also cheap to insure? they must be really safe cars though as i have a young child. im in full time employment, live in a safe neighbourhood, the car would be parked in a locked carpark overnight and im only really looking for third party insurance. please help!!!!!""

Average cost of sr22 insurance?

What is the average cost of sr22 insurance?

ninja quotes insurance

How much do you pay for full coverage car insurance?

i'm 19 and going to buy a car soon but i'm trying to get a ball park figure on how much i can expect to pay

How much did your car insurance go up after a speeding ticket?

I got a ticket a few months ago, and I got one today. Both were oddly enough 21 mph over the limit. I have not noticed a rate increase yet, and I was wondering what others have gone through.""

What is the approximate cost of insurance for a lamborghini gallardo lp550-2 spyder?

Car insurance question?

Originally I registered my car insurance with my previous address. Now I've moved to a new place, do I require to update the address? What happen if I don't update the address and continuously using my previous address as registered?""

Help in family health insurance in Indiana?

I have a family of 4, My wife and I make about $20,000 a year. Right now, we have to pay $350 a month for health insurance. We already applied for HIP insurance, but it've been 2 years, and they have no positive answers for us. I feel $350 a month is too expensive for us right now, this insurance only pay for us when we have to pay over $10000 at a hospital. For example, if we have to pay $14000 for health, we pay $10000 and they pay $4000 ; anything under $10000, they won't pay. Please help us with our situation, Are there any other options out there. Thank you very much""

How much Do you pay for Car insurance every month?

and what car insurance you have?

What is the Cheapest Insurance?

Hi. My dad has been having AAA as his insurance for $82, compared to our other family members insurance, that is pretty over priced. Isn't the insurance price supposed to go down if you didn't violate anything over the year? And also, i am 16, and have my license, i basically have my dad's old car so he needs to get me into his insurance. What is the best insurance for me and him together? I know Im a minor and the insurance is going to go up but what is the cheapest insurance or best insurance for both of us? My dad wants to switch if ever we find a good deal?""

Does anyone know the best car insurance to buy from with just the minimum required?

i am so sick of car insurance companies taking advantage of people with these super high prices just because the dumb law says you have to have insurance.

How much has your health insurance gone up since the affordable health care act was passed?

I just got notice mine went up by 33.5% last week. Why is my insurance getting less affordable instead of more affordable?

How do you find out if a driver has insurance or not?

My car got hit and the driver took off. I have their name, address, and vin number but they did not provide an insurance company name either because they don't have it or there's a possibility that it was not provided at the time. Who can find this out for me, the police said they can't and my insurance company said they don't think they can either....""

Can I buy Motorcycle Insurance for 3 months?

Is it possible for Geico to do that?

How much will be my car insurance? (I'm serious)?

Guys please take this question seriously and don't even try to answer unless u r going to answer thoroughly I'm 18 and will be 19 in october And I'm getting driver license in a month My parents are not citizen and they don't live in US But I'm citizen and go to high school I heard that my car insurance is extremely expensive since my parents don't live in US But I really NEED to drive my own car ( Not i want to, i NEED it!) I'm aware that the insurance fee depends on companies ***So what I want is approximation or similar examples or similar cases (My GPA is over 4.0 so probably there will be discount... *** if there is, i need every info for discount) And only my mom got her license when she stayed here for few month last year She needs to renew it and she is registered to my uncle's car (I live with my uncle) ***Does this affect my fee? I'm working in city recreation department How can I go work if i don't have car? Now...I ride bike for 4miles to go there... Please help me""

I am looking to get a new car. I am currently on moms insurance - please read below?

I am 26 and purchasing my first new car - I am currently on moms insurance. I will be getting my own insurance. Do you need proof the day you purchase of your OWN insurance - or is proof of my moms insurance enough until I get my own? Also, when you purchase a new car - can you drive off the lot the day that you purchase it? Thanks!""

What insurance companies are cheap for young drivers that have 6points due to non insurance?

What is Private Health Insurance?

My work provides me with insurance that covers medical and some RX. Is this considered Private insurance? Or is Private insurance when you go and purchase the insurance on your own?

How much does insurance cover?

I have blue cross shield insurance I am fourteen how much would I be for Invisalign On my bottom teeth? I got braces on my top years ago The insurance covered all of my tonsilectomy we paid nothing out of pocket.

Is insurance affordable under the Affordable Care Act?

Auto Insurance Quote too high?

I got an insurance quote from Amica Insurance. I've never had any ticketes or anything and they want $ 180 per month. With Farmers it is $360 every 6 months. Why the big difference? I heard Amica is supposed to be cheaper? Thanks

Teen insurance and info two questions in one?

Hi, i am having a tough time with auto insurance qoutes and prices, so i could use some help. Question 1. ok, i am 15, will be 16 in May, if that helps, i have a 1994 Dodge full size van of my own (title was signed to me) and i am getting ready to tag it. i also live in Kansas. ok, i have $500 dollars saved up and have a job that i work 2 days a week and i make about $200 a week. now, i would like to buy my own insurance if possible. is it possible? Question 2. if i can not buy my insurance, can i put the insurance in my mom's name only, and then title it in mine? but one way or the other I HAVE to title it, the title is written out to me on the back in ink, so...................... thanks to any answers or if you know any good cheap insurance companies thanks""

What are typical limits on a full coverage auto insurance policy.?

I was recently in a mans vehicle when he wrecked, I was pretty seriously injured, and now have a lot of medical bills, and surgery bills. I know that he has a full coverage policy with Geico, because they have contacted me, and told me that. The only thing that they will not tell me is his personal limits. I have found out though that He has a history of accidents, and DUI'S. I do not know if that has any affect on his limits or not. I am just concerened about my bills getting paid, and my reimbursement for my lost time, and pain and suffering.""

""Im 17 how much would insurance be for an an Infinity QX56 2013? Its fully loaded and costs $80,470.?

I want one so bad!

Is insurance must for Two Wheelers?

I have a four years old Honda Unicorn. Till now I have insurance for my bike. Now if I do not renew the insurance, what are expected problems ? Legally am I bound to have some insurance ?""

Does anyone recommend a cheap company for my first car insurance policy?

I only have a 1.2 punto so I'm just looking for a nice cheap quote - if such thing exsists?

Self Employed Health Insurance?

My father just quit his old job, he couldn't work there anymore (Too long commute and we lost a parent, so he had to stay closer home for the family) So now he is self employed. We are trying to find insurance that will cover him, 4 children, vision (we all wear glasses) + dental. Does anyone have any suggestions? (We live in PA)""

Do 'normal' car insurance companies insure exotic cars as well?

I've gone to multiple popular car insurance agencies websites and tried to get a quote for a Lamborghini, but in the drop down menu there is never an option for it. I'm beginning to wonder if they even do insure these kinds of cars?""

ninja quotes insurance

How can I get medical insurance if I have a history of pancreatitis?

I've never had medical insurance b/c I've never had a reason too. Never had any major sickness before now, never a broken bone and never sprained anything. My pancreas suddenly became inflamed. It wasn't caused by drinking, I hate the stuff! I believe it was caused by smoking. I've had a few episodes of pancreatitis and was hospitalized once in which it cost an arm and a leg. Should have went to the hospital this last time, but I was so scared of the extra costs. Your pancreas is a major organ. You can't live without it. Am I going to just have to grin and bare it and leave a debt to my family when I die?! I tried applying for the discount but I wasn't eligible b/c I don't have a job. I haven't had one in 4 years. What are you to do. No insurance company will accept me due to the medical problems. I'm scared of what I'll be charged, but even more scared of the pancreas killing me.""

Car insurance?

I heard that you will pay less for auto insurance if you have your license and a clean record even when you nor our family memeber have a car. IS that ture? I mean like you didnt buy a car or insurance when you first get ur license.

Will I be able to buy car insurance?Thanks?

Im 19 and I was on my dads Metropolitan insurance company. I had 2004 Honda Civic but my dad had the car title in his name. I crashed my car and I was at fault so now we're waiting for the case to settle. My dad wants to wait for the case to settle before I buy another car. The case might take another year or more before its settled. I would like to buy my own insurance and my own car. How will the insurance work out or whats the cheapest insurance? Thanks

Is it illegal if someone else pays for my health insurance?

I lost my job last month, and I need to know if there would anything illegal or wrong if say a relative paid for my health insurance until I get a new job? The insurance is through this new Affordable Care Act program.""

""My car insurance was voided in the past, and now I can't get a quote anywhere, can anyone help?!?""

When I started learning to drive at 17, I decided to buy my self a cheap car so that I'd be able to get more experience behind the wheel, pass my test quicker and have a car as soon as I passed my test. I was insured on my provisional license with an insurance company which specialised in learner drivers. However, I ended up getting 3 points on my license the week before I passed my test, in what I still think were pretty unfair circumstances. My house doesn't have a drive or a garage and so I had to park my car on the road in front of my house, or on a street round the corner when there were no spaces. As it was my first car I was really excited, and without understanding that I could get in trouble for it, I used to sometimes sit in my car and listen to music with my friends. The week before I passed my test we were sat chatting when a police car came down the road and pulled up behind us. Someone had broken into some allotments nearby and they were questioning us as to if we had seen anything. They searched my car- for tools that could suggest we had done it I presume, and when they found nothing they ran my license and obviously realised I only had a provisional license. I still at this point didn't realise I had done anything wrong, I wasn't driving the car, simply sat in it so I didn't realise I had committed an offence. The police informed me that because the engine was running, I could have been driving or about to drive and on that basis they convicted me for driving without a license. I only got 3 points and a 60 fine due to the fact I wasn't actually driving and at the time I accepted that with relief, I was terrified I'd get a ban or lose my license or get a massively unaffordable fine. I could have appealed but that would have meant going to court and I was only 17 and that terrified me. I declared the points to my insurance company straght away, but due to the nature of the offence my insurance was invalidated and void. I've only just now realised how serious having insurance voided in the past is. I'm supposed to be moving a 5 hours away in a few months for a job, and I have plenty of money saved for car insurance and a car, as without a car, the move is completely unrealistic. Without a car I won't be able to get to work as the hours are unsocial and my job isn't very well connected with public transport at all and so relying on public transport or taxis is simply not an option. I found a car, went to get an insurance quote, and found out that getting insurance is practically impossible when you've had insurance voided in the past. The points don't seem to be a problem, when I tell companies about my points but not about my insurance voided in the past they happily give me a quote. They're expensive, but affordable and it's what I was expecting. However, as soon as I tell them that my insurance was voided in the past they refuse to even give me a quote. I'm completely out of options and I don't know what to do. I need a car, but I can't get insurance as much as I try. I know I was in the wrong, but it seems like the voided insurance is more of a punishment than the points are and surely that isn't right? And the voided insurance will stay with me for the rest of my life, so does that mean that driving will never be an option for me? I'm sorry for the essay, I just really don't know what to do! If anyone's been in a similar situation with voided insurance or know of a company that would insure me then please let me know! Just anything that would help, let me know! Thank you so much in advance and sorry again for the babbling!""

Car Insurance?

anybody know what the Uk cheapest car insurance for somebody with 15 years no claims discount car engine size 2.8cc?

""If we are getting affordable heath insurance, why can't my employer afford it?""

If we are getting affordable heath insurance, why can't my employer afford it?""

How much is small business insurance?

Hi I am doing a project for school and I was wondering how much insurance is for a small business. It will be a temporary food vendor. I am looking at owner, liability, product liability, and auto insurance. I just need an estimate if you could help. Thanks!""

Can my insurance tell what the ticket was for?

So, I live in CA and i have AAA insurance. My daughter got a speeding ticket and i know it will raise my insurance. and i know they can tell that thre is a ticket on certain person's name but can they tell what the ticket was for???""

Any ideas on how to get cheaper car insurance?

Will my car insurance rate increase if my car is stolen and never recovered?

I also have GAP insurance.

How does insurance either supplied by an employer or by the government drive UP the price of health care?

Motorcycle Insurance?

I am currently trying to get a motorcycle license and I'm wondering if there's any insurance company that would insure me. I'm 18, in California and I don't have a drivers license yet. I have passed the written test for a drivers license but haven't been able to schedule a behind the wheel test yet because my family's lack of cars (mom/dad uses them to get to work until ~8). So while I'm waiting for that to happen then I'm might as well try to get a motorcycle permit because we have my dad's old (but not so old) one. But question is, is there an insurance company that would insure somebody like me? Price isn't too much of an issue because I have a job with no added financial duties so to say.""

Can small business owners & the self-employed get quality yet affordable health & dental insurance...?

if so, how?""

Auto Insurance average for me?

I've had my temps for about 8mos now, and I'm going Togo to driving school for my license. I'm 17 years old. How much do you think average coverage should be?""

What is the most affordable health insurance in NYC?

My friend doesn't have health insurance and is planning on putting his new baby (born around Oct.) on his policy with him. He's Latin American and has his permanent residence card, but is not yet a citizen. Anyone know of any affordable plans for him to look into in the Manhattan area?""

Are there any health insurance programs like healthy families?

I know healthy families are for children and teenagers but are there any other medical low cost program for kids in their early 20's. There is medical but what if they don't qualify for medi-cal, and if the parents don't make enough money and kids don't have any job because our economy is whacked. How we suppose to take kids to the doctor when they're sick? Please help, any helpful information would be greatly appreciated. God bless!""

How can i get cheap insurance?

I'am going to be 17 soon and i going to buy a car so i was wondering what car should i buy or what shoul i do to get cheap insurance, because at the moment it's cost about 3.500 and that just too expensive... help please""

If my son is on my parents insurance does that mean they claim him on his taxes?

Okay my son is now 1 year old. He is on my parents insurance, we live with them, and my parents pretty much support him.(pay for all expenses).. Now my sons father wants to put him on his taxes. I know he just wants to get money to get him a new car. he also says he will get me a car too. but idk about that. When i told him i think my parents already claimed him, he started yelling its his son, and told me to give him his security card(he has a really bad temper and gets angry to where i get scared) so i did.. but now i need to sign a paper..and i dont want too.. Here is my thing i told him that he is automatically on my parents taxes, because he is on there insurance, so that would mean i would have to take aiden off of their insurance(Which means he wouldnt be on any insurance)he started yelling how stupid i am and just to sign paper, my question is is it true that because my parents have him on their insurance, he is on their taxes. What should i do? Thanks for anyhelp. Sorry long question. Please no rude answers""

Cheap auto insurance for mid-california...?

i had a accident in december last year and a speeding ticket doing 90 in a 55 last year.. 2 different occasions. i am buying a 2002 jeep grand cherokee laredo and wheni went to geico they said my quote was like $406 a month.. thats crazy. progressive was $199 a month.. but it still seems outrageous... cant i find it cheaper than this? please help..... im 23 female who has had my license for 7 years since i was 16, never had it revoked or anything.. how do i get my rates to go down?""

For my car insurance I have full coverage. Have a $500 deductible to fix a broken window. Is that normal?

A rock hit my window while I was driving and i have a $500 deductible to fix it. I wanted to see was that really high or normal? I have full coverage. I just want to see how this insurance compares to others. $500 deductible just seemed a bit high. Thanks!

Question about car insurance. Will give 10 points. thank you!?

Well i have a basic hometown insurance, and they charge me 415bucks, im 16 years old and male. We own a Chevy Venture, 2000 toyota camry, and 1989 toyota camry, i don't own any, so how can i be still getting charged? I thought only the owner will get charged, i can drive under my dads insurance.? My dad owns the toyota camry, 89. Sister owns the 00 camry., dad owns van.""

Should I drop collision from my auto insurance this renewal?

I have a ten year old Honda Civic, just over 40,000 miles, has a crack in the driver's side rear bumper that I ignore. I have an excellent driving record, no points, am the only driver, am at that age where I'm not young enough or old enough to be considered a threat, but I live in a high rate state and money is more than tight and they just shot my house insurance through the roof, even though I never put in a claim, because, get this, there is a chance that someday we may have a hurricane! Am I being pennywise and pound foolish, or am I paying for something that won't pay off even if I need it? Thank you!""

How much do you think i'll be paying for car insurance?

I'm 16 from Massachusetts, and i'm going to be getting my license next month! I have saved enough money and i'm going to be buying a volkswagen beetle from the year 2000. how much do you think i'll be spending a month on car insurance? i took drivers ed so that could help.""

Good car insurance??

I will be 16 in a few months and am hoping to get a Mustang two doors. soo it might be a little higher insurance..Is there an insurance company thats better than another?

ninja quotes insurance

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/can-you-drive-learners-permit-without-insurance-anthony-lopez/"

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steveandtorixinthemiddle · 4 years ago

Photo

Steve, Tori, and X in the Middle

Hello and Welcome to our new blog (If I’m being completely honest, I will probably be the one posting the most) about the next adventure in our lives. I suppose we should introduce ourselves. Let’s start with Steve because he’s the funny one.

Who is Steve? Well he has been a construction worker in various fields for most of his adult life. In 2011 he discovered Wii golf, which got him interested in the actual game. At first it was just playing on his PS3, but eventually we were able to find a decent set of second-hand clubs meant for a lefty. The first time he came home from the golf course (after what he described as the most horrible round in history) he was grinning from ear to ear and happier than I had seen him in a long time. He said he didn’t get remotely close to par, but he’d enjoyed himself immensely. He has gotten better but says he will never be a pro.

Steve is funny. I mean gut-splitting, spit milk out your nose, pee your pants funny. Most of his quiet little comments go unnoticed by those who don’t know him, and they are missing a lot of laughs because of it. He has bought nearly every stuffed animal I own (and I own a lot of them, mostly ladybugs) because he enjoys making other people smile. Okay, mostly me.... Then again, he also worked two jobs to put me through college, so you have to know he’s a good guy.

Funnily enough, people actually think Steve looks a little scary. I don’t usually see it though. I see a big teddy-bear, or a really goofy guy who just wants to have fun. Sometimes I accuse him of being a ten-year-old in the body of a grown man (I guess like BIG) because he loves fart jokes and many of the other things every boy I’ve ever known has liked. This man used to sit down and watch a couple hours of Sponge Bob when our son was small. He watches Red Green, Monty Python, Mythbusters, and the Mel Brooks movies and wishes he could do something like that.

Now me, I suppose. Well, I’m in my late thirties, but sometimes feel three times my age. I haven’t had an easy life (who has?) and my body is feeling it. In 2017 I had a pretty bad fall that resulted in lingering pain for years. Pain so bad that I couldn’t even walk. We had no medical insurance at the time (we were poor, but not poor enough, and living in SC, a state that didn’t take kindly to the ACA), which meant that the injury went untreated, even undiagnosed.

If the physical injury wasn’t enough (it really was if you ask me), the meds that they gave me to treat my PTSD were late a couple times. It was a medication with a warning I was never given. Occasionally someone will withdrawal from certain medications in such a way that it causes damage. This particular withdrawal caused me to have seizures, brain zaps (which can only be described as electricity zipping through your head every time you move it, or even your eyes) and suicidal thoughts so severe my husband had to take several days off work just to sit with me.

All totaled I was trapped mostly in bed or in a wheelchair. I was depressed and anxious. My PTSD was worse than ever. I was feeling hopeless and alone all the time, and I honestly wasn’t sure if there was any reason to keep going. I would have really great days, when I was able to get my wheelchair down the ramp, take the bus to the store, even see my friends. And then there would be days when my hip would lock and I would fall down.

After a fall I could usually expect to be trapped for days in my bed, in unending pain, and mostly alone as my husband had to work, walk the dog, take care of me, do all of the household chores, and literally everything else. My only contribution to our life was using the phone to pay bills and make cigarettes. I felt like I was a burden to my husband. It just got worse and worse and I didn’t see an end.

It’s interesting what life gives you sometimes. One afternoon, when I couldn’t find any inspiration for a fanfiction story I was working on, I started looking on YouTube for anything that would keep me entertained. As I was scrolling through, I saw a video from Trent & Ally (Experienced Van Builder Creates Masterpiece (4k) Van Tour). When the video ended I remember thinking, ‘if I’m going to be stuck in bed all the time, I wish it moved.’ I had no hope of having “van-life” adventures. Not with my health so bad, or with my mental health not much better. Still, it gave me something to dream about.

Then one day my husband sat down in his chair across from the bed, looked me in the eye, and said “we’re going back to Maine.” He’d had enough of seeing me suffer. So, we came back to Maine. It didn’t work out the way we planned. We had to leave our dog Chyko with my cousin (his original owner, who had raised him from a pup) and his family and take the train and a bus to get there, which meant leaving almost everything behind for the second time (we’d done that when we moved to SC after I found my mom).

Almost immediately after getting to Maine we were able to rent a lot with an old trailer on it (1972) not far from Steve’s brother. Right after moving in, I applied for Maine Care, which is Maine’s version of Medicaid. After a while, with the proper medication and a LOT of hard work, I started to get better. First it was just walking from the bedroom to the kitchen. Then I wasn’t staying in bed all day anymore, I would sit at the table. After a while I was walking several times a day from one end of the trailer to the other.

You should have seen my husband’s face when I told him I was going to walk to the store for the first time. I actually thought he might cry. He walked beside me the whole way, telling me over and over how proud he was of me and grinning from ear to ear as he “showed me off” to the people of the town he had grown up in.

It’s funny the way things happen. Covid shut down the country. More and more I wanted out of my house. I took over walking the dogs (who we adopted from Steve’s brother when they moved to a place that wouldn’t allow dogs) twice a day. I started going out with my sister-in-law to stores and walking through them, first in my walker, and more recently on my own two feet with absolutely no help!

Over the past year I have gotten stronger. I will never be where I was before. I will never walk 23 miles with a toddler on my back again (yes, I did that once). I won’t be skydiving, or cliff jumping, or any of the major things I wish I could have tried at least once when I was young enough to survive (he he he). Still, I have a lot of life ahead of me. I’m glad my husband didn’t let me give up.

And now we are preparing for our next adventure. We are going to buy a shuttle bus and turn it into our home on the road. We have several reasons for this. One of those reasons is to pay off all of my outstanding medical bills. I literally owe so much that if I keep paying at my current rate it will take me 417.8 years to finish. So in part, I suppose this is about making sure we don’t leave that debt to our son.

There are other reasons though. One of them is that I would dearly love to meet a few of the couples/families/individuals I began following on YouTube over the past three years. Another reason is because we will never be able to afford a retirement on what my husband makes working in a grocery store (which was his only option after moving here) and we need to go where the work is. We also want to see the country, find out who we are now that “mom and dad” aren’t our biggest titles anymore, and to keep us both active and healthy.

(Okay, and because someone told me I couldn’t do it and I’ve never been able to resist proving people wrong when they say that, so long as I actually WANT to do it).

I’m sort of hoping my husband can put together a show of his own, that people actually enjoy watching on YouTube. Sort of a mix bag kind of show that brings in elements from his favorite shows and movies that really speak to us both. We would love to make videos about how and where to fish, or how to get a fishing license in a state other than your own. I’d even like to do my own short segment, sort of like what Mariah Alice does in her videos. Just talking about what I’m feeling, and why. Figuring out where I go from here.

And... both of us want to help others in our situation (low income) make a go of the life. We watched, horrified, over the last year as more and more people lost everything to wild-fires, floods, even evictions. We want to make it possible for other people to take their homes on the road with them. We want to help families who are really struggling figure out what to do next. And we want to really join in the community (which will be hard with my social anxiety, but not impossible).

Mostly, I think we just want to live while we still have time. I’m done existing. I want to really enjoy what is left of my life. And I want to keep getting better. If I am ever going to check off the last item on my bucket list (WALKING the full length of the Appalachian Trail) then I need to get much stronger than I am now.

As for who is traveling with us...

The young Marine in the picture is our son, Tim, who has made us incredibly proud. He lives on base and seems to be doing very well. I wish he would call more, but what can I say, he’s an adult now and deserve the right to start his life, not keep his mom worry-free. He won’t be traveling with us, unless he decides to visit when he can build up some leave time.

If you look at the picture of me lying on the couch covered in dogs however, you will meet Madison (a twelve year old pitt mix) who we adopted from Steve’s brother. She is sweet and affectionate, but tends to bark at strangers and friends alike (you can only tell the difference by the beating your knees take from her tail). Beside her is Avalanche, her son, whose name fits him perfectly. His father was mostly lab, which shows. He is super affectionate, and if he doesn’t get my attention he will put his paws on my leg and lick me half to death until he does.

Both our dogs tend to bark when there are strangers around, though we are trying to get them into the habit of only giving one bark, to warn us. Unfortunately it is a bit more difficult to retrain older dogs, so it hasn’t been as easy as it was with retraining Chyko. Thankfully neither of them have huge health issues, but Madison is getting older. We’re hoping that since she isn’t full-blood pitt she will live a little longer than it says online.

Our plan is to stay in Maine during the summers, except perhaps an occasional trip, and mostly travel in the fall, winter, and spring. We do want to avoid the heat (mostly because my husband is afraid I will go supernova and take half a state with me if I get too hot), but we really want to see our son and visit with our other family down south, but then we will probably follow the weather to avoid costs associated with heating or cooling.

Right now we are just at the beginning. We’ve only just made the decision and haven’t even gotten our shuttle bus yet (though we are looking for the right one). We are gathering the supplies we will need to start. We plan to live in the bus during most of the build. Basically we have to do the insulation and redo the floor, walls, and ceiling of the bus before we build out anything, but the whole idea of hooking up the solar terrifies me and makes my husband a bit nervous too, so we will probably wait on everything but a little Jackery until we really know more.

We’ve been watching hundreds of YouTube videos a week for the past two weeks! We have a list of the things we NEED, and the things we want. Right now we are focused on needs first. Things like the ability to cook and wash dishes and have light at night. There is so much more to do, and it will probably be fall before we even get on the road in a barely renovated bus.

We might be crazy. We probably are. A least a little insane. Still, if that crazy makes us happy, gets us out of debt, lets us figure out who we are now, and enables us to see friends and family we dearly love and miss, then I’ll take a bit of that crazy any day of the week.

#bus life #bus build #travel #new adventure #change #getting out of debt #empty nest

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1rban · 5 years ago

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Confession: T and I both recently realized that we prefer binging on a program than watching one episode per week.

Evidence: Defending Jacob, Bosch (Season 6) and, Truth Be Told.

Terrific T and I started watching Apple TV‘s original show Defending Jacob about a month ago when it first came out in April. Every Friday, Apple TV releases a new episode.

Before discovering Defending Jacob, we had just completed a binge on the Amazon original Bosch. After anticipating its release for nearly a year, we devoured the entire Season 6 of Bosch in one weekend. Honestly, it probably didn’t take us all weekend to watch the entire show. Feeding our need for binging, we recently started watching Truth Be Told.

Defending Jacob

Produced by the subscription video-on-demand web television service AppleTV+, Defending Jacob is an American crime drama miniseries based on the 2012 book of the same name written by William Landay. Defending Jacob is Landay’s third crime novel.

Defending Jacob focuses on the haunting story of the Barber family as they grapple with the accusation that their 14-year-old son, Jacob, could possibly be a murderer.

Premiering amid the COVID-19 pandemic on April 24, 2020, the series, created and written by Mark Bomback and directed by Morten Tyldum, stars Chris Evans, Michelle Dockery, Jaeden Martell, J.K. Simmons, Cherry Jones, Pablo Schreiber, Betty Gabriel, and Sakina Jaffrey.

Jacob is played by Jaeden Martell, who does an excellent job portraying a conflicted and confused fourteen-year-old teenager. Chris Evans (Captain America) and Michelle Dockery (Downton Abbey) act superbly in their roles as Jacob’s parents, Andy and Laurie.

Andy’s father is played by J.K. Simmons, who has grown to be one of my favorite actors–maybe its the hairstyle–since first seeing him in the TV series The Closer. Since then, Simmons has portrayed several excellent characters in notable shows. He also plays Professor Nathaniel Burke of the University of Farmers in the funny Farmers Insurance Group commercials and is the voice for the yellow M&M.

The crime drama is tense, albeit slow-moving, with ample twists and turns. The Barber family lives are turned upside down with the accusation that young Jacob killed one of his fellow classmates. It remains to be seen if the end destination is worth the journey, but Terrific T and I are enjoying the series so far. But we came to the realization, as we have been watching it week to week, that we much prefer being able to sit down and binge a show than drawing it out for months and months.

Bosch

Bosch continues to be one of our regular favorite series to watch. Based on the novels by Michael Connelly, the Amazon TV series was created by Eric Ellis Overmyer and stars Titus Welliver in the title role of Harry Bosch. Harry Bosch is a Los Angeles Police homicide detective who works on solving murders in his city. The series also features Jamie Hector, Amy Aquino, Lance Reddick.

Truth Be Told

Terrific T and I’s current binge-worthy drama is a show on AppletV+ called Truth Be Told, about true-crime podcaster trying to resolve the mystery surrounding a family patriarch’s death. The show features Octavia Spencer and Aaron Paul in the lead roles. It is based on the Kathleen Barber novel “Are You Sleeping.” The show highlights the difference between white and black culture and the deep racial tensions that exist as true crime podcaster Poppy Parnell (Octavia Spencer) re-investigates the case of a convicted killer she helped put away. The program is taunting and tense, featuring intriguing characters. The actors portray their roles well and are highly believable.

In addition to entertaining us, Truth Be Told introduced us to a line of work that we didn’t know existed–the death doula.

What is a Death Doula?

I am glad you asked…

Like a birth midwife helps individuals bring life into the world, death doulas help people at the end of their life. Doulas walk with the dying person and their family, helping them navigate the entire end-of-life process. This is a fairly new option available for dying people and their families, but one that has seen a rise in demand over the last several years. Doulas empower families in caring for their dying loved one and journey with them through the grieving process. Death isn’t an ideal situation for anyone. Having someone guide dying individuals and their families through the painstaking process of dying from a terminal illness relieves stress and eases the burden of family members. Doulas provide psychological and emotional support during the end of life journey. To be clear, they do not aid or accelerate the dying process, but act in serving others, ensuring that no person need die alone.

Businesses Are Dying

Last week saw an uptick in stories about businesses that would not reopen post-COVID-19. First, the Lizard Lounge and then Highland Park Cafeteria announced they would not reopen. Wolfgang Puck’s 560 is done, having announced their plans to close permanently two weeks ago. The COVID-19 crisis has been tough on business, resulting in the permanent closure of local Dallas-Fort Worth institutions. Worldwide, the number of businesses that will not reopen after COVID-19 will skyrocket in the coming weeks as this virus threatens to be even harder on the lives it leaves uncertain and unsettled in its wake.

It’s hard to remember that our area got hit by several tornadoes last October 2019 and that there were businesses still trying to get back on their feet from that mess before many of us knew that coronavirus wasn’t a result of drinking too much Mexican beer. And then along comes COVID-19. The virus not only hit hard physically and socially, but it unleashed a series of devastating economic blows halting an unprecedented economic boom dead in its tracks.

Yes, Johnny, the world will reopen. Yes, we will get past this deadly, devastating virus that has turned life as we once knew it upside down. However, the landscape will look different as we venture onward as we uncover the hills and valleys along our new terrain.

The impact of COVID-19 reaches far beyond the growing death toll. It has a profoundly human effect unlike any that I have seen in my life. In and of themselves, these are results we’ve seen before, but not assembled together lining up to unsettle all facets of our lives.

“Craziness scares us because we are creatures who long for structure and sense…” Esmé Wang

This is a virus that not only kills us physically, but threatens us mentally, emotionally, economically, and spiritually. As a result of COVID-19, there are people whose dreams are vanquished to the junk pile of unrealized expectations. There will be marriages that crumble and families that won’t look the same in the COVID-19 aftermath. There will be those who, feeling like they’ve done all they can do, will check out mentally, emotionally, and physically. Totally spent and completely broken, they’ll simply say “Sayonara.”

It is in this sphere that chaplain work will come into play in the lives of the people I shepherd. There will be grieving, mourning, and even gnashing of teeth. People will be struggling, looking for someone to walk alongside them on this difficult journey. As chaplains, that’s what we do. As a workplace chaplain, I spend time developing relationships with others so that when they find themselves in a place of hurt or desperate need, they have someone they can lean on.

I guess that’s what struck a chord with me as I first learned about the death doulas. In a world increasingly more connected, we are more divided and alone than we were before any of us had ever heard of virtual meeting rooms and platforms like Zoom. The familiar places we visit collectively and the shows we binge on together afford us a sense of connectivity. God created us to be social beings, recognizing early on that it’s not good to be alone.

Prayer:

Father God, help us not be isolated as we distance from one another during this pandemic. Encourage those who are hurting as a result of COVID-19. Give us the wisdom to use the necessary precautions as we slowly get back to life after the standstill COVID-19 brought. We pray for the business owners who are struggling and fighting to stay afloat. We pray for the workers who need jobs. We lift up to you each and every person suffering from the consequences of the coronavirus, be it health, emotional, mental, physical, or spiritual pain that they are experiencing. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Reflection Questions:

Have you ever thought about the ways we can help people who are dying alone?

Do you know of a local iconic establishment that is closing for good after COVID-19?

In what ways do you see people struggling from the impact of COVID-19?

Whose life can you positively impact today?

Today is May 18. Our niece Natalie would have turned 31 today. She’s not physically here to celebrate her birthday with us. While we walk in the assurance and with the abundant joy of knowing that she’s in Heaven dancing in the presence of God, those she left behind still miss her. We’re grateful for the short time we got to spend with her and look forward to that day when we will all be reunited.

In addition to making a guest appearance on Kathryn McClatchy’s “Unleashing the Next Chapter” later this week, it appears I have been nominated for two blogging awards which I will share more about in my next post. Until then, may your week be filled with blessings and joy. I pray that you will see something positive and remarkable happen in your life today. That’s it for now.

Blessings,

The Devotional Guy™

ABOUT: The Devotional Guy™ is a writing ministry of Rainer Bantau, a seasoned gospel preacher, church musician, and chaplain ministering to individuals in their workplaces, to the homeless, and wherever he meets them. He shares helps, hope, and insights on his blog, The Devotional Guy™.

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Sources:

Amazon TV

Apple TV+

IMBD

Wikipedia

Wang, Esmé Weijun. (2019). The Collected Schizophrenias. Graywolf Press. Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Find me on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram!

Thank you to the wonderful visual artists and photographers at Pexels, Pixabay, and Pixlr.

I believe that to experience life the way God intended, you and I must receive God’s gift of salvation through Jesus Christ. Through Jesus Christ, God has made this gift available to all who ask.

“Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”

Romans 10:13

Will you personally receive the gift of eternal life so that you can experience the total forgiveness from your sins that come through believing in the atoning death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ?

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God- not by works, so that no one can boast.”

Ephesians 2:8-9

My Monday Morning Cup | Yes, Johnny, the World will Reopen… Confession: T and I both recently realized that we prefer binging on a program than watching one episode per week.

#Binging #binging on TV #Bosch #COVID-19 Devotional #death doula #Defending Jacob #economic disaster #Highland Park Cafeteria #Lizard Lounge #natural disaster #Reopening America #Social Distancing #tornadoes #Truth Be Told #uncertainty #unsettling

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apollymi · 8 years ago

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A bit of a rant

Just when I think we’ve got our heads above water again, something comes crashing back down to change all that.

Because somehow, despite working over 70 hours in the last two weeks, @katsuko1978’s IKEA paycheck take-home was less than $300. Hell, it was barely $200. We needed that money to pay rent. In fact, we’d been hoping to get rent paid on time or early this month. Instead, now, we’re going to have to wait until the 4th when my check goes in and hope that she makes enough at the restaurant to make up the difference.

And I still have to pay another $110 to the IRS as soon as possible. They want it within seven days (I’m not sure if that’s seven business days or just seven days) in order for me to keep my part of the contract. But the other part of the IRS said that they will be sending me a letter saying it has to be paid in full within 30 days. And I just don’t know. It’s ridiculous.

But in addition to our nearly $1000 rent payment, I also have to come up with that $110 for the IRS. Plus $110 in late fees that will be assessed to our rent because we have to pay after the 3rd now. And I just have to hope that I have all this together by the 9th, because on the 10th, they evict us. Plus I have to pay for our storage building (another $70) and renter’s insurance ($25). And then there’s the Verizon phone bill ($214). But at least I managed to get the internet and car insurance paid before this.

I’m regretting going to the eye doctor, though. Yes, I didn’t have any more contacts and, yes, @katsuko1978’s glasses were six years old, but we need that money now. I don’t regret the money I spent towards getting Roo taken care of, even the $90 for them to make a paw print impression for us, because that needed to be done, but that was a huge $400 bill.

Because, yes, cremation is apparently expensive as hell, but I wanted my boy to be treated right.

I’m just out of ideas. Obviously, I’m also out of money. I’m about to the point of trying to sell plasma for money. I’m already going to be selling a lot of my DVDs and BluRays for money and hoping I get a decent bit for them. I’m also probably going to be selling my XBox 360.

I’m just… This is all too, too much. I’m mentally and emotionally and physically exhausted. I’m at the point of possibly having to say no conventions this year. I might have to tell @mistmarauder not to come visit in September because we won’t be able to afford anything while she’s here, if I’m crunching the numbers right. And I might need to cancel my doctor’s appointment for next month, the one that’s supposed to tell me while I’ve had a period last three and a half weeks, go down to spotting for a week and a half, then start again ten days ago – and is still ongoing.

I’m at my wit’s end.

Wit's end or not, I guess I need to include a link for my PayPal pay page: http://www.paypal.me/AdoraAddams

#apollymi gets real #real life #fml #money

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austinpanda · 6 years ago

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Dad Letter 03242019

Dear Dad--

Happy Sunday! It has been a slow, somewhat plodding week. The most exciting thing that happened was, I decided I wanted to rediscover one of my favorite computer games of all time, so I started to install it, only to find that the game was still on my computer from years ago. I’d never removed the game; it had just been sitting there. All my saved games, too! The game is called Diablo 2, by the way. As far as walking-around-killing-everything games go, this is one of the best of all time. You just walk around and kill every living thing that isn’t you. (I admire its purity, obviously, though lots of games are like this.) The other, very important component of games like that is the rewards, and this game does rewards really well. Kill some monsters, and they drop gold and other loot, and you pick it up. It’s unnervingly addictive!

Another almost-interesting event from last week, I discovered there’s a video game where: It’s winter, and you’re in Russia in a suburban apartment block. And that’s it. That’s the game. No enemies, no clock, you just walk around this bleak-ass Russian neighborhood, in the dead of winter. You have an apartment. You can cook food. It’s called a “sandbox” game because it’s not a thoroughly constructed game with rules and things that kill you, and things you must do to avoid losing the game. It’s just you walking around one of the most depressing neighborhoods in the world. The game is called “It’s Winter.” (because of course it is) I read an article about it, but I’m for damn sure never going to play it. I’ll include some pics from the game. When you see pictures of a boring place with nothing happening, that’s this video game!

We are ready to visit Boulder to look around the place and see if they have a home we might be able to afford. We will check the city to make sure you can see mountains. From looking at maps and pics of Boulder, I don’t know how you could be in Boulder and NOT see mountains, but I have to see them myself before I completely believe that they’re there. What must it be like to wake up in the middle of the night and have a mountain right next to you that’s getting snowed on. I think this is a better plan than Michigan, although we are giving up two very nice perks of having chosen Michigan: northern lights, and affordable housing. Rent in Michigan was more affordable than anyplace else, and we’re going to miss that while we look for any housing that doesn’t suck in the Boulder area. My needs aren’t that great, because more than 550 square feet would be a step up from the current place.

So, the Mueller report has dropped, and no one yet knows what’s in it! How ridiculous is that? It kind of feels like America’s greatest anti-climax: All this time waiting for something, and now it’s happened, and we have no idea what’s in it. I’m sure that’ll stay in the news for a while until whassname Barr figures out how much can be made public, then stuff will get released, both sides will claim victory, etc.

That old bugaboo depression has been vexing me heavily this past week! Just been feeling sad and unimpressive in all ways. My job is inconstant in ways that offend my fondness for routine. This kind of complaint makes me wonder if the Buddhists have it right. It seems their most basic tenant is that shit changes, and the less you accept that, the more you suffer. This is part of why I’ve wanted to move to a different state from the first time we came up with this idea, in order to change my whole way of doing things, and see how I liked the new normal. Rip the band-aid off; change everything at once! I guess this is why the plan scares the shit out of me sometimes, too. It’s a lot to figure out. For example, my insurance and my doctor would go away. How do I get my meds I need?

I’ll figure it all out in due time. First, gotta fly to Boulder and make sure it exists, and doesn’t suck in some way we hadn’t anticipated, like...there’s mountains there, but they’re ugly and they smell bad for some reason. Also, apropos of nothing, I seriously want a cigarette right now, but since I don’t own any, I won’t be smoking today. That’s three weeks. It helps having games like Diablo 2 to play, now in particular, because I can take the cigarette craving and channel it into killing monsters and stealing their belongings.

More next week. TTFN!

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ma-at-thought · 8 years ago

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Story-time With Ma’at

Who Knew That Healthcare Was So Complicated?!

So, I have insurance.

I also have a temptation to just leave that there with no further elaboration, but that would be an exceedingly short story.

Having insurance in the US is a huge topic right now. So me talking about having insurance like it’s a problem is exactly the wrong tone; if you’re reading it like that, give it a minute. I am exceedingly thrilled to be insured, but also yikes.

As some of you know, my Worthy Opponent was in a bad car accident this past fall. If the airbag hadn’t deployed, I’d probably be lacking a Worthy Opponent now; as it was, there was enough damage to the knee that surgery was required, and it’s likely that full mobility won’t ever be restored. But we’re fine, right? Workmans Compensation ought to tide us over until at least partial or temporary disability can be established. But no, it was concluded that the Worthy Opponent shouldn’t have been considered “on the clock” at the time, and short of being gifted with a swarm of lawyers, there’s bupkis we can do about it.

So we went to apply for any and all government aid we could. I’ve been dealing with a fine selection of health problems for years now, most of which have gone untreated, since I was uninsured and had to pay for visits to the doctor out-of-pocket. Bless my doctor’s heart, he knew I was having trouble and gave me extended prescriptions like generic Ambien instead of requiring a check-up every couple of months, but he couldn’t send me anywhere for blood work or radiology or anything because he knew I couldn’t afford it.

I was very hopeful when the Worthy Opponent and I applied for all these things. We still have no income beyond donations from friends and my writing commissions, but we did get food assistance quickly, so we’re not at immediate risk of homelessness. We got paperwork for Medicaid, and the Worthy Opponent was asked for more extensive information, but without explanation, I was denied.

You can imagine how upset I was.

Our caseworker, bless her heart as well, has been very responsive to emails, and when the Worthy Opponent inquired, it turned out that I had been denied because I had been on Medicaid for over a year.

AND NOBODY FUCKING TOLD ME.

I’d been paying out-of-pocket for everything medical and putting off necessary tests for over a year because apparently I’d been approved but it somehow got lost in the fucking mail. I had no idea.

So horray, I have insurance! I got the number to call for information, and I eagerly went about seeing what was covered and what I could schedule to make up for years of minimal medical care. They gave me a list of doctors in the area that accepted my new insurance (my old one apparently does not, sadly), and when I inquired, a list of psychiatrists as well.

Three out of four of the doctors recommended to be primary physician weren’t in practice in the area anymore (one hadn’t been for years), and the fourth wasn’t of the needed specialty. Same story with the psychiatrists, except that one of them was inpatient only. These are who my insurance suggested I go see. A bunch of medical professionals I could not go see.

I’ve spent something like eight hours over the past week calling around, asking random medical practices what they cover, trying to get more reliable information from the insurance company, and if I didn’t need mental health care before, I sure do now.

Today, I walked in to the nearest medical practice. That happened to be the local Planned Parenthood, conveniently located by my favorite grocery and pet stores. I asked if they knew of any internal medicine doctors who were taking new patients, and any psychiatrists who accepted Medicaid, with the sort of stressed and vain hope that something local, regardless of specialty, would be able to at least point me in the right damn direction. I was handed lists within minutes, with a bunch of up-to-date options for various specialties including mental health and complete assurance that yes, my specific insurance would cover them. The local Planned fucking Parenthood managed to do in minutes what my own insurance had been incapable of doing in days.

...so I guess the moral of the story is Planned Parenthood is awesome, and medical insurance for the non-wealthy is a fucking nightmare no matter how you look at it.

#Also PP offers way more services than would be expected #APPARENTLY INCLUDING FINDING ME A DOCTOR BETTER THAN MY INSURANCE COULD

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apathylsdeath · 8 years ago

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Black Night, White Light Chapter 9

Runaway

“Are we sure this is going to work?”

On the bunk next to her, Raffe sighed and folded his arms behind his head. “You got any better ideas?”

Penryn had to admit that she didn’t. Still. The plan was one of the kind where a lot could go wrong. And a lot depended on things happening like they expected them to.

“What if the fire alarm doesn’t actually trigger the alarm system? Maybe the alarm can only be triggered from some sort of main control room.”

“They need a system that anyone who spots an intruder can use. If a patrol gets wind of a raid, there needs to be a way to raise the alarm quickly. That’s the whole point of an alarm.”

Penryn sat up on her bunk. She was too anxious to rest anyway. “And what if the alarm shuts down all doors?”

“How would they evacuate in case of a raid?”

“Maybe the point is to keep the intruders out?” Her voice was irritated. She grabbed her boots.

Raffe let out a long exhale, as if fighting for patience. His voice, however, was soft when he said, “Look, Penryn, we can’t know for sure what’s going to happen. But right now, a distraction is our best chance at getting out of this place. And you want to get out of this place, right?”

She nodded, feeling her anger drain out of her. She didn’t even know what she was angry at. Or who. Yet ever since she’d seen Raffe in the middle of that ring, beating a Resistance member to a pulp, she couldn’t shake the resentment that was growing inside of her. It wasn’t that she was sorry for the guy who’d taken the beating. It was his own fault for voluntarily participating in the fight. So why did the image affect her so much?

“Now is as good a time as ever,” Raffe said and jumped off his bunk, lifting the thin mattress. He bent a bedspring upward until it broke off with irritatingly little effort. Maybe the memory of him in the ring affected her so much because it had brought back what she’d seemed to have forgotten over the last few days. That he was a soldier, ruthless and violent, trained and able to kill. To kill her people.

“Time to do your little trick again.” Raffe threw he bedspring to her and she caught it out of the air. She finished lacing up her boots, then slid from her bunk and crouched in front of the door, inserting her makeshift lock-pick into the lock. This time didn’t take as long as yesterday and after a few moments, the mechanic lock unlocked and she slowly pushed open the door. Like last night, the hallway was empty.

“Apparently they still think a flimsy lock is enough for us,” Penryn whispered, tucking the broken-off bedspring into the waistband of her pants.

“Seems like one would do good not to underestimate you.” Raffe’s voice was low, but she was sure that she didn’t imagine the hint of approval in his tone. A warm feeling of triumph spread through her, and she internally chastised herself for it.

They made their way down the hallway, stopping at every corner to listen for guards before proceeding. They didn’t even have a specific destination, just to get as close to the exit as possible before triggering the alarm.

“Well, look who’s strolling around at night. Again.”

Penryn nearly jumped out of her skin at the voice behind her. She turned around to see two familiar redheads in the hallway behind them. They sauntered up to them, grinning like Cheshire cats.

“We were wondering if someone forgot to lock your door yesterday, or if you’ve been given permission to wander around. I guess now we know for sure. You two really are some troublemakers, aren’t you?” Dee (or maybe it was Dum, who knew?) waggled a finger at them like a parent scolding a child.

Raffe and Penryn said nothing.

“When Obi finds out that you’ve managed to snuck out of your cell twice already, he’ll be even more eager to recruit you,” Dum said.

“Assuming he doesn’t kill you first.”

“But we gotta hand it to you, you are resourceful.” They both nodded in approval. “So what exactly is it that’s got you sneaking around?”

For a moment, neither of them spoke. Penryn desperately tried to come up with an excuse, while Raffe seemed to prefer not to say anything.

Dee raised an eyebrow, lips quirked in amusement. “Well?”

Oh what the hell, Penryn thought, they know anyway. She sighed. “We were trying to get out of here.”

Dum gave a mock gasp. “You don’t say!”

Penryn shot Raffe a look, just in time to catch him roll his eyes. She looked back at the twins and gave them her most charming smile. “Look guys, it’s not like this place isn’t great and all, but we have something really important to do and we can’t afford to waste any more time. Which is why we need to go now.”

The twins exchanged a look. “We’re not surprised. We told Fitzroy you wouldn’t want to stick around. Why does no one ever listen to us?”

“Though I hope you weren’t planning on simply waltzing out the front door. What’s your plan?”

It was Penryn’s turn to roll her eyes. “Don’t get me wrong, but I don’t think telling you would be the best idea.”

Dee shrugged. “Well, we could turn you in either way, so why not humor us and tell us whatever genius plan you came up with?”

Penryn threw Raffe another glance, but his expression was once again unreadable. She sighed in defeat. “We wanted to trigger an alarm to cause a distraction.”

Dum raised an eyebrow. “Using the old fire alarm system?”

“Yep.”

“Not a bad idea, though you’d have to press the button a specific number of times to actually trigger the alarm.”

“Otherwise, any prankster could do it.” Dee winked at them.

Penryn felt frustration building inside her. They didn’t have time for this. Why could the Resistance not simply let them go? “How do you know so much about the alarm system anyway?” she asked, suddenly suspicious.

“Oh, if anyone knows about it, it would be us,” Dum said. “After all, we rigged it up.”

“You- what?”

Dee winked at her, as if the baffled tone of her voice was a compliment. “I know, impressive right? We know a thing or two about tech.”

“You didn’t think we were just here for our good looks, did you?”

Penryn didn’t know what to say. Frankly, she hadn’t put much thought into the twin’s role in the Resistance yet. Seemed like these two were more important than she’d thought.

“So what now?” It was the first time Raffe had spoken since DeeDum showed up. He sounded irritated. “Will you turn us in?”

They exchanged a look. “That depends. Why are you so desperate to get out of here? Don’t you want to fight for your country?”

“I already have a family that I have to fight for,” Penryn cut in before Raffe could give a smartass reply. “And right now, my sister is in danger, so I really don’t have time to stick around any longer.” She realized that real desperation had crept into her voice.

The twins must’ve realized it too, because they once again exchanged a look.

“We knew you’d never stick around. It was only a question of time,” Dee finally said.

Penryn felt a sliver of hope grow inside of her at the tone of their voice. “Does that mean you won’t turn us in? You’ll help us get out of here?”

“Ah ah ah,” Dum shook his head. “We don’t deal in pleasantries. They don’t get you very far in the world we’re living in. We can help you get out of here. But you’ll owe us a favor in return.”

“A favor?” Raffe asked skeptically. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, we don’t know yet,” Dum said. “But something tells me we’ll meet again and when that happens, I’m sure there is something useful you can do for us.”

Penryn looked at Raffe to see if he was just as bewildered as her, but his face was one again unreadable.

“What’s the catch?” she asked.

“No catch,” Dum said.

“Just a favor,” Dee continued. “Some time in the near future. As an insurance for worse times to come.”

Penryn gave them a skeptical look. To her, that pretty much sounded like a catch, but what choice did they have?

“Alright,” she said finally. “If you help us get out of here, we owe you one.”

The twin’s faces split into identical grins as both of them reached out their right hand at the same time. “Excellent. We have a deal.” Penryn and Raffe exchanged a look, then grasped the offered hands to seal whatever ‘deal’ they’d just agreed on.

“Now, let’s get straight to business,” Dum said. “The fastest and easiest way to get out of this place is through the air duct system. However, all access points are being monitored.”

Penryn raised an eyebrow. “Does the Resistance often keep people that don’t want to be here?”

Dee grinned. “Often is a relative term. But the monitoring is to make sure that no unwanted visitor gets in without us knowing, not the other way around.”

“So how do we get into the air duct undetected?” Raffe cut in.

“Leave that to me.” Dee said. “You can follow my handsome assistant. He’ll show you where you can access the air duct the easiest and I’ll make sure that you get in undetected.”

Dum turned to his brother. “Dude, I’m so not your assistant.”

“Come on, I said you were handsome.”

Penryn blew out a weary breath. “Guys, can we just go?”

Dum gave a mock bow. “Sure thing. We wouldn’t want to keep a lady waiting.” He motioned for them to come with him. While they followed the scrawny twin through the corridors, he quickly gave them instructions. “Listen to me, and listen good, because I’ll only tell you once. When you’re in the air duct, you crawl forward until you hit a crossway. Then you go right. Then forward for the next two cross-ways, then left and left again. If you’re on the right track, it should get hotter, since you’ll be directly next to our boiler room. Keep going forward until the fine odor of sewerage hits you. That’s when you can start looking for an opening to climb out of the funnels.”

They walked into the main hall, which was deserted at this time of night. The massive ventilator in the far wall was still spinning slowly, giving off a droning sound. Dum lead them through the hall toward the far wall, pointing at a small square metal grid embedded into the concrete. When they were only about half a dozen feet away, Dum suddenly stopped, holding up a hand for them.

“If we go any further, the camera’s will spot us. We’ll need to wait for Dee’s signal to know that it’s switched off.” He murmured, pulling a small automatic screwdriver out of his pocket.

Penryn scanned the walls and ceiling around them. “I don’t see any cameras.”

Dum grinned. “Of course you don’t.”

“What kind of signal are we talking about?” Raffe asked.

As if on cue, the lights in the hall went out, plunging them into total darkness.

“That signal.”

Penryn felt a hand grasp her wrist and then she was being pulled forward, stumbling to keep up with Dum’s quick steps. A pocket light was switched on, throwing a beam of light onto the wall. Dum pushed the pocket light into Raffe’s hands and quickly began to unscrew the grid that covered the air duct. “The electricity will be out for exactly 85 seconds. That’s the max that we have unless we don’t want an alarm to be triggered. Blackouts aren’t rare down here, but for security reasons, we’ve installed an automatic alarm that goes off if a blackout lasts longer than one and a half minute.” The grid fell to the ground with a loud clang. “So Dee will turn the electricity back on in exactly-” he threw a look at his watch, “35 seconds. Quick, in there.” He pushed at Penryn, who quickly climbed into the narrow funnel, ignoring the throb of pain in her thigh. She scuttled forward on hands and knees, looking over her shoulder to see Raffe climb in behind her. The funnel was barely wide enough for him to fit in.

Behind them, Dum was already attaching the grid back over the opening. “Good luck,” he whispered when he was finished, then the pocket light was switched off and they heard him depart with quick steps.

For a moment, neither of them moved. It was completely dark around them and Penryn was overcome by a sudden feeling of claustrophobia. Nevertheless, she began to move forward on her hands and knees.

When the electricity switched back on, they had already rounded the first corner and the only source of light in the funnel was the few beams that fell through the occasional grid in the wall. Their proceeding was maddeningly slow since they had to move as quiet as possible to not make too much noise. Most rooms that could be seen beyond the grids they passed seemed to be storage rooms or sleeping quarters, but occasionally, they passed a room where people were awake and passing the time, either working, playing cards, drinking or… Penryn blushed and quickly scuttled forward. She didn’t want to linger around a grid that lead into people’s private quarters.

From Dum’s instructions, it had sounded as if they would be out of the funnel system within less than an hour, but the distance between the crossways stretched endlessly long. They fell into a somewhat mindless routine, crawling forward on hands and knees, one hand on the wall to feel for any corners or crossways.

It was only when Penryn felt a bead of sweat drip from her chin that she realized how hot it had gotten. She paused. “Do you feel that?” she whispered over her shoulder. She could barely make out Raffe’s silhouette in the darkness, but his presence was heavy behind her, somewhat calming.

“We must be close to the boiler room,” he murmured. She nodded, then realized that he couldn’t see it in the darkness. “Let’s keep going.”

They continued forward and sure enough, soon they passed a grid behind which they could make out a sparsely lit boiler room. Penryn peeked into the room, eyeing the various machines that stood in the room, some of which she’d never seen before. “This doesn’t just look like a boiler room,” she whispered. “I wonder what those other things are.”

Before Raffe could answer, the door in the room opened, and a Resistance member entered, followed by a tired looking Fitzroy. Penryn flinched and drew back from the grid.

“The rations won’t last much longer,” the guy with her said. “Even if we cut them in half, we’ll need to stock up soon.”

“We’re almost done with the logistics of the Port Pinkton hit. If it’s a success, we’ll get plenty of supplies. We just need a few more days to smooth over the last details.”

Penryn suddenly felt cold, despite the heat. Port Pinkton was a private harbor in the Northern District, mainly used by merchant ships in private property. Anyone wealthy enough to afford a ship in that harbor either had excellent connections to the Guardians, or was Guardian themselves. If the Resistance planned a hit on Port Pinkton, it could mean some serious damage to the Guardian’s stock import. Not to mention their trading relationships. But there were civilians in that harbor as well, privileged, ignorant civilians who turned their heads away from the problems and injustices happening in less wealthy parts of the city, but civilians nonetheless.

She took a deep breath and began to crawl forward again. No point thinking about that now. She had to get out of here, hold up her part of the bargain and then find her sister. And maybe then she would allow herself the luxury of thinking about other people’s problems.

They kept moving in silence. Penryn had lost her sense of time in the darkness. Her shirt was soaked through with sweat, the humid air pressing against her head, and her palms and knees were scraped raw from crawling on all fours for so long. But they kept moving forward. And forward. And forward. Until finally, the stank of waste-water and excreta hit them. Penryn never thought she’d be happy at the smell of that, but now she actually let out a sigh of relief. She stopped in front of the next grid, peeking out. Beyond, she saw nothing but dark canalization tunnels. “Think it’s safe to go out?” she asked.

“We can’t be sure. But I’d say we’re faster on foot.”

She nodded, pushing against the grid. As expected, it was screwed shut.

“Let me,” Raffe said and she moved forward to give him space. He gripped the metal grid, shook it once as if to test it, then pushed against it forcefully. It fell into the wastewater below.

Raffe climbed out of the opening, then helped Penryn out of it. Her boots landed in ankle high wastewater, splashing against her pants. Well, now isn’t the time to get squeamish, she thought.

“How is your leg?” Raffe asked her unexpectedly.

“It’s better. It barely hurts anymore.”

Raffe nodded. “We’ll have to keep walking for at least a few more hours.”

“Then we should get moving.”

Wading through wastewater wasn’t exactly pleasant, but it was better than continuing to crawl through narrow air funnels, so Penryn wasn’t complaining. Raffe lead the way, as confidently as if he knew where they were going and she was too exhausted to question it.

Hours passed in which neither of them said a word, and slowly, a fog of numbness spread over her mind, emptying her head. She just walked. She was bone-wary, an exhaustion that reached deeper than normal tiredness. They passed a ladder that lead up to a manhole cover and Raffe stopped. “We should get up here.”

Without waiting for her answer, he pulled himself up on the ladder, quickly climbing up the steps. Penryn watched as he pushed against the cover, lifting it slowly to peek outside. Whatever he saw must’ve satisfied him, because he pushed it fully open now and climbed out. She followed him quickly, eager to leave the canalization behind. Her head popped out of the manhole, her nose suddenly filling with a gush of fresh air – well as fresh as the air got in the city – and she saw that they had come up in an abandoned alley. Perfect.

“What luck, huh?” She said as she stood up and Raffe closed the manhole cover again. He nodded and looked around. Even without reading a street sign, it was obvious that they were close to their destination. The walls left and right of them were clean and free of soot like they only were in the Northern District. The usual cover of garbage was missing, just as the unsavory characters lounging around in alleys. Which was good because it meant that Azabu Boulevard couldn’t be too far. However, it brought up a new problem.

“We can’t walk around looking like this,” Penryn said, gesturing to their tattered and dirty clothes. “Not in the Northern District. We’ll stand out like a sore thumb.”

“That is a problem,” Raffe agreed.

He and Penryn walked toward the main street that the alley opened onto. Penryn scanned the shops and cafés that lined the street, her gaze catching onto a chick dress shop on a corner. “Don’t worry,” she murmured, an idea forming in her mind. “I think I got us covered.”

“I see you’ve done this before.”

Penryn ignored Raffe as she crouched in front of the shop’s back door, glad that the large containers in the alley hid them from the main street. They had successfully made their way across the main street and into the narrow alley next to the dress shop without being called out for their appearance. As expected, they had found a back door to the shop in the alley, probably a delivery entrance that lead to the storage room. It was absolutely perfect.

She felt Raffe crouch behind her, ducking behind the cover of the container, and his sudden closeness made her back tingle. “How long do you need to pick that lock?” Raffe whispered.

“Longer than it would take me if you wouldn’t distract me,” she murmured back and didn’t have to look at him to know that he was rolling his eyes. She turned back to the lock. They were in luck. The door was secured with a barrel lock, not with a code or hand scanner. This one was a type she’d seen many times before on other shops in this District, and she was familiar with the process of picking it. By now, she had the motions down in her cerebellum and so it didn’t take her much more than a couple of minutes until the lock gave a barely audible click that indicated that the door was now open.

She stood and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I don’t know if this particular skill makes you resourceful or just a common criminal,” Raffe said.

“Well, without this skill we’d still be stuck in the Resistance, so…” She grinned at him.

“Come on.” Raffe pushed the door open a crack and paused, cocking his head to listen. He’d proven excellent hearing over the last days, so Penryn said nothing and waited. “Sounds like no one is close,” he said finally and pushed the door open fully.

Behind it – as expected – lay a storage room, larger than the front of the shop had let believe. Countless racks and shelves ran through the room, boxes piling in large stacks. Raffe silently closed the door behind them.

Penryn didn’t waste any time and quickly began opening boxes and scanning the contents for anything wearable that would help them blend it. As customary for the upper classes, female fashion consisted mostly of elegant shirtwaist dresses, A-Line skirts and all sorts of expensive fabrics. While Penryn didn’t mind putting on a dress or a skirt, it wasn’t exactly practical in case they had to run or fight their way out of a situation, and so she was relieved when she found a box with simple navy blue women’s slacks. It didn’t take long to find a plain blouse that would go with them, and while she was at it, she grabbed a pair of underwear as well (with a sneaky look at Raffe to make sure he didn’t notice). Most importantly, she found a jacket that felt thick enough to protect her from the cold.

It was only when she had her full outfit assembled, that she realized that there was no space to change in private. She turned to Raffe, who held a few items in his hands as well.

“Alright, I guess we should change…” she murmured. Raffe nodded. She looked around, well aware that she would have to strip completely naked to change her underwear as well.

“Don’t worry, I’ll turn around,” Raffe said dryly, and her face heated up against her will. He seemed to notice, because his eyes lit up with amusement. “I won’t look.” He sounded sincere enough, but she saw the teasing smile he tried to stifle.

She huffed. “You better not!”

She caught his low chuckle as he turned around and for a moment she just stood there, glaring at the back of his head, before she remembered that they were standing in the storage room of a shop they’d just broken into, and someone could come in and catch them any time. Also, Raffe didn’t seem to be prissy about undressing in front of her, because he unceremoniously pulled his shirt over his head, baring his muscular back. He threw the shirt onto the ground and moved on to open his pants. That made Penryn snap out of it and she quickly turned around, cheeks burning. She hastily stripped off her clothes and changed into the new ones. The pants fit surprisingly well, the legs wide enough to hide most of her boots, which surely didn’t fit the rest of the chic outfit. She tugged her white blouse into the high waistband of the pants and turned around.

Raffe was already fully dressed but he still had his back to her and she realized that he was waiting for her to confirm that she was fully dressed.

“I’m done,” she said.

“Alright,” he said and turned around. He had chosen simple dark pants and had put on a dark coat that looked great on him. Other than her, he didn’t look out of place in expensive clothes, but rather as if they’d been tailored specifically for him.

Penryn nodded. “Good choice.” She looked up at his face and saw that he was running his eyes over her as well.

“You too,” he said. There was something in his voice that made her feel awkward for some reason.

“Well, I guess we’re good to go like this,” she muttered.

In that moment, the door at the end of the storage room opened and a clerk entered the storage, arms full of dresses. Penryn and Raffe looked at each other in a moment of shock. The woman hadn’t yet noticed them, but she would only have to come around the shelf to spot them. Quickly, Penryn scooped the heap of discarded clothes from the floor and stuffed them into the nearest box, before Raffe pulled her into a small nook behind a particularly tall stack of boxes.

Wedged between the boxes and the wall, there was barely enough place for one person, let alone for a man of Raffe’s size. They stood pressed together, peeking through gaps between the boxes to watch as the clerk made her way through the storage, carefully hanging clothes on racks or putting them into boxes.

Penryn tried to ignore Raffe’s presence behind her, but it was difficult, with his warm breath fanning across her neck and her back tingling from his closeness. She felt goosebumps erupt over her skin and suppressed a shiver.

She almost thought that they’d successfully evaded being caught, when the clerk suddenly made a beeline for the stack of boxes they were hiding behind. Penryn recoiled from the gap she’d been peeping through, instinctively drawing back and bumping into Raffe, who was still standing soundlessly behind her. He put a steadying hand on her waist as she faltered.

The clerk began rummaging through a box at the front of the stack. Penryn held her breath. The woman was only a foot away from them, and half a dozen boxes weren’t the best cover. She drew back as much as possible, which wasn’t much with the limited space that they had. The entire length of her back was already pressed against Raffe. Who, she realized now, still had his hand on her waist, his touch firm and warm through the thin material of her blouse. Her pulse was pounding in her ears.

The clerk still wasn’t done. Surely she was taking longer with these boxes than she had with the others? Raffe fidgeted ever so slightly behind her, his movement brushing against her. Penryn felt like she was ready to explode with tension when the clerk finally turned away, walking briskly back to the shop with her arms full of new clothes.

Penryn started to get out of their hideout, but Raffe tugged her back against him. “Wait!” He was so close that he whispered directly into her ear. “She’s still in the room.”

Penryn strained to hear. He was right. She could hear the gentle sound of rustling fabric, though she never would’ve picked it up without Raffe’s warning. Once again, he had demonstrated shearing well above average for a human. She wanted to mull over that fact, but it was hard to concentrate with Raffe standing close enough that she could feel his body heat against her back.

They heard the door clicking shut. They waited a few more seconds and when no sounds could be heard, Penryn quickly stepped out of their hide-out. She turned around to Raffe, who stepped out behind her. “That was close.”

He nodded. For a moment they looked at each other, a somewhat awkward silence stretching between them. She still felt his warmth against her back, remembered how solid and strong he had felt. Her skin tingled where his fingers had curled around her waist.

She cleared her throat. “We should get going.” Without waiting for an answer, she pulled on her new jacket and turned away. With her back to Raffe, she could think more clearly. His heavy gaze on her made her thoughts tangle. And she couldn’t afford to lose her wits.

She pushed through the door, welcoming the burst of cold air against her face.

#Pateod #Penryn and the end of days #penryn and raffe #Raffryn #angelfall fanfiction #cyberpunk #mwriting

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gracewithducks · 5 years ago

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With One Heart (Acts 4:32-37) - Sunday School Stories #11, preached for Commitment Sunday 11/18/19

I once heard a story about a man named Thomas Hearne, who was travelling on an expedition to the mouth of the Coppermine River in Ontario. But a few days into the journey, Thomas and his companions were attacked, and most of their supplies were stolen. In his journal about the incident, rather than bemoaning what was lost, Thomas wrote, “The weight of our baggage being so much lightened, our next day’s journey was more swift and pleasant.”

Lloyd Douglas, one of the most popular American ministers and authors of the early 20th century, reflected on this story, saying, “Hearne was in route to something more interesting and important; and the loss of a few sides of bacon and a couple of bags of flour meant nothing more than an easing of the load. Had Hearne been holed in somewhere, in a cabin, resolved to spend his last days eking out an existence […] the loss of some of his stores by plunder would probably have worried him almost to death.

Douglas concluded by reflecting, “How we respond to ‘losing’ some of our resources for God's work depends upon whether we are on the move or waiting for our last stand.”[1]

It’s a preacher story, so I don’t know if it’s true – although I do know that making my kids carry their own bags makes them second-guess just how many books and stuffed animals they really need. When we’re sitting still, we can easily surround ourselves with stuff, but when we’re on the move, we reconsider how much it is we really need.

In our scripture today, we are given a glimpse into the life of the very early church. Luke writes, “All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had… and God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all that there were no needy persons among them” (NIV).

It’s a beautiful picture of a community of people living in mutual harmony with one another – but let’s be honest, it sounds a little too Sesame Street, a little too Pleasantville and Pollyanna – just a little too utopian to have ever possibly been real. It makes me wonder, did the early church ever actually live that way? Maybe in those early days, the good news of the resurrection was still so new and exciting that the first Christians just didn’t worry about anything else. Maybe it’s easier to let go of your possessions when you expect Christ to return and usher in the new age at any moment; you don’t have to worry about saving for the future if you don’t think there will be one. Or maybe, even though Luke says, “all the believers were of one heart and mind,” he doesn’t really mean all the believers. Maybe there were small pockets of communal living, which were celebrated and lifted up as models for the rest, or maybe this is the story that the Christians told about themselves, a hopeful image of the kind of community they aspired, in their own faltering ways, to be.

But even if the story really did start here, with sharing everything and no one in need, it didn’t last for long. Just a few verses later, the Gentiles come to the apostles complaining that only the Jewish widows are being cared for, while Gentile widows go hungry (Acts 6:1-7). The early church quickly faced conflict and division over the question of if and how non-Jews could be a part of the new Christian community (Acts 10, 15). And Paul wrote to the Corinthian church admonishing them, because not only were they divided into factions, but the richer members would feast and leave nothing for when their poorer members made it to the table (1 Corinthians 1, 11).

Truly loving one another as we love ourselves – it’s hard. Sharing what we have, generously and without reservation, is hard. Keeping an open mind, keeping an open heart towards people who are different from us, who hold different ideals and different views – it’s hard. And trusting that, if we share, there will be enough to go around – it’s especially hard, when we see around us over and over again that there just doesn’t seem to be enough.

In many ways, the early Christians lived in a different world than we do. Many of us are carrying debt, significant debt, sometimes more than we even imagine or hope to pay back in our lifetimes. And at the same time, far too few of us have any money saved for the future. However, the early Christians also knew about debt and fear for the future; then as now, it takes so little to derail our plans and throw our lives into a tailspin. It’s overwhelming and terrifying to realize that one medical emergency, one mistake, a fire, a downsizing, a disaster – or even just outliving our savings – can leave us begging for help.

Every day we see signs advertising spaghetti fundraisers and posts for go-fund-me accounts, saying: please help this family, please help this friend, with one more heartbreaking story to tell. Even the most heartwarming stories we share – of children raising money to pay off their classmates’ lunch debts, and engineering students crafting medical equipment that insurance won’t cover, celebrities or even churches stepping in to erase medical debt or help someone in need – those stories are beautiful, yes, but they’re also discouraging, because beneath the warm fuzzies is the reality that we live in a world and a nation where fear is woven right into the fabric of our being, where at any time, any one of us could go into a freefall, where school lunch debt and medical bankruptcy aren’t just real but are common and overwhelming – we live in a society where, in our own fear and in our own greed, we’ve lost our sense of responsibility for one another. I remember once hearing a suggestion that, instead of forcing everyone to make a go-fund-me page when they got sick or a tragedy occurred, we could instead all contribute to one great big go-fund-me fund that could be used by anyone in need – you know, like some kind of social safety net? But somehow it’s a crazy, impossible ideal – even though other nations seem to be able to make it work – it’s a crazy, impossible idea to suggest that I’d be willing to pay more in taxes if it means I knew my neighbors wouldn’t go hungry, that when someone got cancer their family could support them without worrying about how to afford the treatment they need – and if it meant knowing that, when our family falls on hard times, there would be a net to catch us and something in place to help us back up.

Maybe we imagine that we’ll never be the ones in need. Or maybe we just like to be heroes: we like to feel generous, to hear those sad stories for ourselves, to see misery on display, to be appealed to individually, maybe even groveled to and gushed over – it makes us feel good, feel important and powerful, when we choose to give. And God absolutely calls us to step up and help whenever we see someone in need. But just as important – maybe even more so – just as important is the far less glamorous work of consistent giving, of faithful generosity, of giving back a portion of our resources to God. It’s less flashy, less gratifying, but even more powerful in our lives and in the lives of others when we build generosity into the very fabric of our lives.

When God was preparing the people to enter the Promised Land, they first had to learn to trust in God. They learned the lesson of the manna, the miracle of bread from heaven – and the real miracle that, somehow, each person always had enough. And God said, “When you enter the Promised Land, remember how, when you were hungry, my grace kept you fed. When you enter the Promised Land, give back the first and the best parts of our harvest for my work. And build into your society care for others, especially for the hungry and the vulnerable, the strangers and the sick and the poor.”

And when Jesus came to call us back to God’s ways, he said, “Where your treasure is, there is your heart” (Matthew 6:21). And he said, “Don’t worry about tomorrow” (Matthew 6:34). And he said, “They will know you are my disciples by your love” (John 13:35).

The book of Acts paints a picture of a generous community, the kind of place where people are willing to give everything they have in order to make sure no one else is in need. Not everyone gave everything – and I’m not asking you to give everything today. But it is worth asking: what do we give? Do we bring our best to God, or do we give God the crumbs, the leftovers, after everything else is said and done?

The biblical standard for giving is a tithe, or 10%. Actually, that’s the Old Testament biblical standard; in the New Testament, as we’ve seen, the standard for giving is everything. But on average, most Christians today give about 2.5% of their income to churches.[2] Some give much more, of course, but many give much less. Among the three major religions in our nation – Christianity, Judaism, and Islam – Christians aren’t even the most generous, not by a long shot; our friends in the other Abrahamic faiths almost double our giving.[3]

It’s a shame that the religion of the cross and resurrection, of dying to self and rising to Christ, of loving others as we love ourselves – it’s a shame that our faith is no longer know by our generosity, compassion, or grace. The world outside knows us by our judgmentalism, by our hypocrisy, by our worst examples, by our biggest failures, by our exclusion and prejudice and unwritten rules – but how I wish they would know us by our love.

Two and a half percent. Some give more, but many give less. And we can say maybe people are giving to secular charities these days; we can blame church politics and scandals, we can blame the lousy economy – but then again, during the Great Depression, the average for giving was 3.3% - in the season which, for our nation, is the literal epitome of poverty and despair, Christians were more generous than they are now. Maybe it’s because there was a shared sense of struggle; maybe it’s because the suffering was so clear and so prevalent, that more were willing to share so needs could be met. In fact, throughout history, the most generous people aren’t usually the rich – the rich are too far removed from their neighbors – but the most generous people are those who don’t have much to share… but who know their neighbors, and try to love them as they love themselves.[4] While big numbers make the headlines, most giving – whether to churches or to charities – most giving comes from moderate households, from modest and ordinary folks, but when all those smaller gifts are put together, they really add up.

That’s why Jesus doesn’t praise the giving done by the rich, but instead he praises the gift of the widow’s mite (Luke 21:1-4). The one who fed crowds with just a few loafs, who said faith like a mustard seed was enough to move mountains – Jesus knew that it’s not the size of the gift that counts, but the spirit and faith therein (Matthew 14:13-21; Matthew 17:20).

Maybe you really are giving all you can: friends, God sees you. The Lord who knows all the hairs on your head; the one who clothes the lilies and praises the widow’s gift is with you. God sees your heart. And maybe this isn’t a season when you can make a financial commitment or give any more than you already can. But maybe God is inviting you to step up in another way: we have open seats on committees, work areas and ministry teams; you could volunteer at church events, you could commit yourself to calling and checking in with church members, to visiting, to serving at Alpha House, volunteering in the community, praying regularly for our church and our members, brainstorming creative fundraising ideas. Jesus didn’t come to balance budgets; he came to show God’s love. Jesus cares about what you do with your finances, but more than that, Jesus loves you.

And maybe, when a little extra income surprises you – a raise, a bonus, an inheritance, a tax refund, or some other unexpected blessing – remember to share and pass that blessing on.

Many of us are giving all we can. And I honor that; I honor you. But I also know that many of us aren’t giving all we can – not even close. We aren’t giving until it hurts; in fact, we’re barely even feeling it. Maybe you haven’t stepped up your giving in a while. Maybe you give when you think about it, when you happen to come, when you remember to put some money in your pocket on the way out the door. Our church is currently operating at a deficit; we are sustaining many of our ministries thanks to the generous investments of the saints who’ve gone before us. And we are grateful for those gifts, for those investments in the church’s future, for those who made sure their ministry would outlive them – and if you haven’t thought about it yet, what legacy are you going to leave behind you when the day comes? Will you remember the ministries of the church in your estate? Whom will you bless, even after you’re gone?

Friends, I am so grateful for the legacy that brought us this far, and for the generosity of each one of you and of the saints who’ve gone before. But I firmly believe that we are at a crucial moment in our church’s story: and I believe, with all my heart, that God is not finished with us yet.

The question is: do you believe it? And are you willing to commit to the work, to invest in the vision, to support the worship, the discipleship, the fellowship, the missions of this body in this place?

In the future, when they tell our story, will they say: this was the season when the church was afraid; when giving dried up, and they circled the wagons, and anxiously counted the sacks of flour we had left? Or will this be the season when we keep moving, when we trust God enough to lighten the load – to share and use what we have, to dream big and give bigger, to trust that, by God’s grace, there will be more than enough to get us where God is calling us to go?

May they know us by our faith. May they know us by our generosity. And above all, may they know us by our love.

We thank you, God, for the saints who’ve gone before us; we stand in awe of the legacy we’ve inherited – and we also stand in awe of the opportunities you’ve given us. We find ourselves in a crucial moment: will we plan for the future with hope, or with fear? Will we be known for our stinginess, or will we be known for our generosity? We pray, Lord, that the world will know us by our love. We pray that you would make us like the earliest church, people united in heart and mind, a community of people committed to caring for one another and to sharing the good news with the world. Send your Spirit on us, as we make our promises and our pledges for the coming year. Fill us with hope; fill us with courage; fill us with peace. In Christ’s name we pray; amen.

[1] Lloyd C. Douglas, The Living Faith. http://www.sermonillustrations.com/a-z/s/stewardship.htm

[2] https://pushpay.com/blog/church-giving-statistics/

[3] The average American Christian donates a little over $800/year; Muslims on average donate more than $1300, and Jews $1440. https://www.cheatsheet.com/money-career/average-church-religion-donation.html/

[4] People with a salary of less than $20K are eight times more likely to give than someone who makes $75K. https://pushpay.com/blog/church-giving-statistics/

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